Raizen and his brother get Isekai'd reworked
by Raizen1125
Summary: Repost and rework after adjusting due to some valid reviewer critique on things I hadn't considered. Comedy Fic. What happens when a writer and his normie brother get isekai'd as their OP NTBSS characters, and end up screwing up the timeline in their attempts to bring world peace? The short answer? Shenanigans. Eventual SI/Kushina, OC/OC, Minato/Mikoto
1. Chapter 1

**So I've been kind of not feeling writing for a while. Though, this idea popped in my head, and writing OC's is good practice for hashing out skills I'll need when I revisit my original stories. This will be a something to the tone of the original Dragon Ball or Dragon Ball Super. An action comedy with elements of romance. I got the idea when I was editing my character on Shinobi Striker and I was like...Isekai but with a guy who doesn't actually like the show that much. Then I couldn't get out of my head how potentially funny the idea was, so here we are. **

**Chapter One: Enter Miharu and Tom Cat...**

Waking up without remembering going to sleep is a pretty jarring experience. It's terrifying, and when you compound it with a horrific headache, then it becomes a class A nuisance. This was the first sensation I became aware as I slowly came out of the fog of sleep. At first, nothing seemed wrong, until I realized I was laying on grass and not my bed. That woke me up pretty quickly. I frantically looked around, to find myself in a forest clearing. While that initially was not super jarring, the fact I had hair on my head was. Considering I haven't had hair on my head since one of my friends started undergoing treatment for cancer, that really threw me into a panic. Plus, my normal hair was brownish black, whereas this was bluish black, and long as hell.

At first, I thought 'Huh. Maybe it's a prank'. Nope. 100% real, because that shit hurt when I tried to pull it out off my head. Secondly, I was wearing some odd looking, yet vaguely Japanese clothing. Considering I'm extremely cheap with apparel and also NOT Japanese, this was almost certainly not something I should own. I let out a sigh, before I dragged a hand down my face, only to freeze when I didn't feel the scar on my left eyebrow, which has been there since I was six. Thirdly, I was tiny. Like, back to prepuberty tiny. This led to a rather intriguing realization, which caused a rising panic in my stomach. I was not myself anymore. This newfound existential crisis led me to do the only thing reasonable in the situation: Bash my head against a nearby tree. Which was super painful, by the way.

I admit, not my brightest move, but in my defense, hurting myself is my most common way of getting out of unwanted dreams.

"Holy shit, I'm not dreaming." I couldn't help but say it aloud. I was about to start freaking out when I heard a familiar groan behind me. I turned to see an almost perfect replica of my brother's game avatar slowly pulling himself off the ground. "D'aw. Hey buddy, you have a nice nap?"

"Shut the fuck, Matt." The figure said while he slowly stood up, and leaned against a tree. "Wait, why the hell are you here? And where is here?" A pause, taking in my new appearance. "And why the hell do you look like Miharu, your Strikers character?"

"That, my beloved brother, is the million dollar question. But judging from the fact you look like Tom Cat right now, I think the only explanation is-"

"No. Don't say it. Don't you fucking say it."

"We got isekai'd into the Naruto World."

"God. Damnit. And after all that shit we talked on the genre too."

"I know. Which means we're probably in hell since it's all about ironic punishments." I stated in annoyance, before I started flipping a coin.

My brother took notice, before he shook his head and voiced the question on his mind. "Why the hell are you flipping a coin right now?"

"Because I find myself with a rare opportunity. I'm going to fuck up _everything_. And then

I'm going to wife me either Mikoto or Kushina." As I began to cackle maniacally, Tom Cat just facepalmed.

"Seriously? That's your plan?"

"Well, no. That's merely like step 6. First, we're gonna go kill Madara in that fucking tree of his, along with that prick Zetsu. Then, we're going to the Leaf Village to convince the Hokage we know shit about the future using info we should know. Assuming he doesn't torture and murder us, we're going to enlist- oh fuck me." A pause. "We're only around fucking 12 again. That means we're genin age and we don't know where the fuck we landed time wise. Luckily, the visit to Konoha will help us figure out when we are in the timeline. Next, we're going to convince Sarutobi, assuming he's the Hokage already, that Danzo is a cucklord and that he literally causes the vast majority of problems for the village with his dickish ways. Then, we're going to either prevent the Third Ninja World War from breaking out entirely, or use it to foster international peace. Then, I'm going to wife me a ninja girl." I finished excitedly, throwing out my arms in a dramatic fashion.

"Jesus. You really thought of all this just now?"

"What? Oh god, no. This is literally all culminations of years of dissatisfaction with both the Naruto show and its god-awful dumpster fire of an FFN community. I was going to use this for a fic where I had Itachi do some time travel shenanigans. But this is like, way more fun." I stopped flipping my coin, and covered it. "Alright. Heads or Tails?"

My brother groaned, before shaking his head. "Fine. Tails. Wait, why?"

I uncovered the coin and fist pumpted. "YES! It's tails. Meaning I'm wifing Kushina." Tom stopped immediately.

"You cannot be serious. You're going to derail an entire anime series and timeline because you hate Minato that much?"

"You bet your ass I do. Now come on. We've got some testing to do. They may be crippled old fucks but I doubt Madara and Danzo are just going to let us kill them. So that means we need to figure out what we have access to."

We took a few paces back from each other, before going into thinking poses. Tom was the first to speak.

"Okay, so from what I remember, your headcanon was your character was an Uchiha right? And I was a Senju?"

"Correct. Don't worry. I won't kill you for a Mangekyo." I said with a teasing grin, before I began to concentrate on my eyes, feeling the world shift in my vision and the colors sharpen. "Huh. So I'm assuming I have stage three sharingan eyes, right? Because you're about to say-"

"OH FUCK YOU!" WE finished together, though I had a grin whereas he had an indignant expression.

"You get literally the most broken shit in the fucking universe here-" Tom trailed off midsentence, as if a light bulb went off in his head. He began throwing hand signs in rapid speed before I felt the ground below me rumble and a tree tied me up.

I say nothing, instead just raising an eyebrow.

"Okay, I take it back. Keep your stupid emo eyes, Miharu. I can control fucking _Biju_."

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Border of Land of Earth and Fire, Madara's Hideout, one week later...

I stood beside Tom, grim expressions on our faces. We had spent the last week testing the limits of our newfound ninja prowess, and jutsu repertoire. I had a huge library of fire style ninjutsu, Sharingan techniques, and some various other jutsu techniques, including the Edo Tensei, some wind and lightning jutsu, and Snake summons. Tom had a full compliment of Wood style and water ninjutsu, a lot of medical ninjutsu, advanced seal knowledge of the Flying Thunder God, and Slug summons. In other words, pretty much every jutsu we ever used frequently in the game. We were at least high Jonin level/low S rank, which was annoyingly convenient, since that was about the level we were at in the game. When we worked together, we could probably handle anyone short of Kaguya.

As far as timeline goes, we'd managed to figure out that we were around the time that Minato and his generation were in the academy, and just about to graduate. We'd stolen a newspaper from a village on our way over here, and the main headline was 'Tensions between Five Great Villages on the Rise'. That shifted their time table a bit, meaning the Third Shinobi World War was about to break out in a couple years, Kushina was about to get kidnapped in a few weeks, and the incident with the Ame Orphans was about to hit the fan.

"Ugh, I can already tell this is going to be a pain in the ass. Remember, we have to make a detour by the Rain Village to save Yahiko after this, and if we can, kill Danzo."

Tom waved me off, an annoyed expression on his face.

"You make it sound like we're not about to fight the fucking Boogie man of the Uchiha AND the embodiment of Kaguya's will. Let's take our suicide missions one at a time, yeah?"

"Aw, you're not fun." I was about to flip through hand seals, when Tom stopped me. "Why'd you stop me? I was about to use shock and awe."

"Because I just channeled you and had an insane idea."

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Madara's Perspective...

"So let me get this straight. That puddle of sludge on the ground over there was the embodiment of a being sealed in the Moon, and his plan he was selling me on would have brought her back, instead of a giant genjutsu?" The withered old form of Madara stated incredulously. He glanced at the two newcomers who'd somehow found his hiding spot. The Uchiha was drawing circles in the dirt in a dejected manner, while the Senju had explained the situation to him. He had used a subtle genjutsu to make them tell the truth, and despite how outlandish and crazy their tale was, they weren't lying.

"That's correct. Additionally, there's this dick named Danzo who fucked up things in the original timeline almost as much as you did, though he's just a warmongering prick. You, at least, thought you were bringing peace." The white haired Senju offered in a placating manner, prompting Madara to sigh once more. He was too old for this shit, but he knew what he had to do. He glanced at the younger Uchiha, before speaking.

"You. Boy." The Uchiha twitched, before he turned to face the older man. "You are my successor to my desire for peace. However, you will need two things." Madara channeled chakra to his eyes, casting Tsukuyomi on the young Uchiha. Immediately, Miharu froze in place, his hair covering his eyes.

The Senju boy looked confused. "What the hell did you just do?"

"Give it a minute."

Suddenly, dark and angry chakra flooded the cave system, before a gray skeleton formed around the Uchiha boy. "YOU MADE ME KILL MY BROTHER!" A skeletal fist lashed out at Madara, before his head shot up, revealing angry and tear-filled Mangekyo eyes. His pattern resembled a buzzsaw, and blood was flowing freely down his face. "I WILL END YOU!"

Immediately, Tom flashed through hand seals and slammed his hands to the ground, causing two giant wooden hands to bind his brother in all but blood.

"Hey, Dumbass, he hit you with Tsukuyomi." That snapped Miharu out of his rage, before his malevolent chakra receded.

"Tom!" Miharu struggled against the vines, before he gave up, merely glad that he hadn't killed his brother. It had felt so real.

"Yes, I did. I apologize, but time was of the essence, as you lead me to believe." Madara then hobbled over to the bound boy, before flipping through a couple seals and then placing a palm on his head. A moments pause, before Madara nodded to himself. "Yes, just as I suspected. You will be perfect for my original eyes." He patted Miharu on the head, before shuffling over to the Senju boy, handing him a scroll from his sleeve. "There is not time right now, but as soon as you save the one I gave my Rinnegan to, replace his original eyes with the ones in this scroll. They will grant him the Eternal Mangekyo."

Miharu and Tom were floored, they hadn't expected this meeting to turn out this well. Miharu voiced his incredulousness.

"Why would you do this? Why help us?" Madara merely shrugged, before sitting on his thrown.

"Because you're telling the truth. You're not from here, but you have the best chance at bringing peace here, though it would probably work better if you didn't plan to prevent the hero from being born." Madara said with mild amusement.

"Listen. Minato doesn't deserve Kushina. She is a queen. And Fugaku's a dick, meaning I'm gonna set Minato up with Mikoto-" Miharu would have continued, but he was elbowed by Tom.

"Whatever your reasons, Madara, we appreciate it." Tom spoke genuinely. They turned to leave, but Madara called out once more.

"One more thing." He tossed two scrolls at them, which they caught. "These contain every jutsu my brother and I ever copied. Use them well, my successors. Now get the hell out of my cave." He formed a hand seal, which lit up an array beneath their feet, teleporting them away.

Madara took a moment to sit back, before he placed his hand in a half Ram seal, causing the entire cave system to light up with seals. As he watched the chakra build up in the cave, Madara felt good about his choice to strive for genuine peace, especially after talking to these strange young boys. He wasn't sure he believed everything, but he'd trust them with his dream of peace. Glancing, he felt hands on his shoulders, turning to see the forms of Hashirama and Izuna. "It was a good life at the end, wasn't it?"

The flash of light in the cave was his only answer.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Back outside the cave, Miharu's Perspective...

We had landed out side the cave rather harshly, just in time to watch the thing explode and collapse.

"I take it back. Your plan wasn't stupid. It was pretty awesome actually." Tom puffed out his chest in pride at my words. "Though, I'm thinking he placed his trust in us rather quickly..."

"He did but we also had information we shouldn't have known, so that probably helped convince him." Tom stated with a shrug, before hopping to his feet. "Now come on, we need to get to the Rain village." He was about to launch himself with chakra when I called out to him.

"Hold up. I need to say something."

"When I killed you in that illusion, I was angry. Because I knew that it was a cursed power I now had in exchange for the life of my brother. No, it wasn't a voluntary choice, but this one is. I want you either take both of my eyes, or at least one of them after you transplant my new ones."

Tom stopped, joke dying on his tongue when he saw my expression.

"Are you sure?"

"If I can repay you for everything you've done for me over the years, and help keep you safe with another tool in your arsenal, then absolutely."

"You do know it might mutate into a rinnegan because I'm a Senju."

"All the more reason to give it to you."

Silence fell between us, as we stared at each other. He pulled me into a hug after a moment, before releasing me. As we moved to start our journey to save the world, he gave me a teasing grin.

"I'm going to be stronger than you now."

"Fuck off."

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

**A random ass idea I had a few weeks ago. It's not going to be a super long fic if I decide to run with it. Again, think Yojimbra style. I wanted to do a semi comedy fic about my blood brother and I getting isekai'd after we talked so much shit on the genre. I didn't actually have a solid idea until I was playing NTBSS one night with him and it hit me. Again, this story isn't going to be super in depth, and the tone as a whole will be light hearted and fluffy.**

**Oh, before I forget, since this is my first actual forray into Naruto, I'll say this now. I'm not making this a fucking harem. If you want that trash, go someplace else, because it isn't happening here. **

**Raizen out. **


	2. Chapter 2

**So for those who know me from my work in the MHA community, welcome back. For the the ones who have just discovered me in the Naruto fandom? Welcome. Don't ask me to write a harem. If I wanted to write trash, I'd go write fanfic for AoT or some other equally terrible show. So if you DM me asking me to add girls to the pairing, I'm going to respond with the text equivalent of derisive and mocking laughter, before blocking you. I already spend too much time around idiots. I'm not going to increase that time by even a fraction of a second. **

**At any rate, if you like wholesome, demisexual friendly romcom with sprinkles of action, you've come to the right place.**

Xxxxxxxx

Land of Rain/ Hidden Rain Village Outskirts, 2 days after the previous Chapter.

Nagato Uzumaki was not an angry man. He rarely found himself drawn into hate, thanks to his two best friends, Yahiko and Konan. However, Nagato was absolutely sure he hated the unnamed Konoha Ninja and Hanzo the Salamander. They had ambushed them after a routine operation that Hanzo had hired them for, with at least 40 weird looking ANBU ninja and Hidden Rain Ninja. The Akatsuki had held their own against the forces until Hanzo had captured Konan, and held a kunai to her throat.

"Hanzo, you bastard! Why would you do this?" Nagato yelled out angrily, demanding answers from the tyrant of Ame.

"You inspire too much hope in the people, and that means they'll eventually look to you for guidance over me. And that? That I cannot have in a small village such as ours. Your mission of peace ends here, boy. You now have a choice. One of you two much kill the other, or the girl dies."

"That's not a choice!" Yahiko yelled in frustration and anger. He bit his lip, before sighing. He knew what he had to do. He was sad he would leave Konan behind, but he could let either of his friends die here. He was about to throw himself at Nagato, when a searing hot blast of fire and a torrent of water tore through most of the enemy forces. The head Konoha ninja looked annoyed at this development, but before he could slink away like the weasel he was, he was punched in the face by a new comer. Hanzo looked over to see what had happened to the man beside him, but he was forced to release the blue haired woman when a tree suddenly shot out of the ground between them. She immediately shunshined over to her comrades, who began to look on in a mixture of awe, confusion, and anxiety.

"I agree, members of the good Akatsuki. Also, Danzo, do you have any fucking clue how stupid your little schemes are? You cause 90% of the fucking problems in this show. Though, can't lie. Decking you in the face was every bit as satisfying as I'd hoped it would be." The newly arrived black haired boy, who seemed to be speaking almost crazy talk at times. His eyes were spinning angrily with the pattern of the Sharingan. Before the ninja identified as Danzo Shimura could shout traitor, another newcomer landed beside the other boy. This one had silver hair and wore the crest of the Senju clan on his shirt. "Oh hell no. No backsies. I get to kill this morally fucked cockroach of a person. After I steal all his Vacuum style shit of course."

The silver haired boy sighed in annoyance. "And you expect me to fight Hanzo the fucking Salamander by myself?" The deadpan tone with which the question was asked would have probably been funny if the situation wasn't so serious.

"Noooooo. I expect you to fight him with good ol' Nagato 'I have the fucking Rinnegan' Uzumaki." The Uchiha shot back evenly, before pointing at Nagato, confusing the founders of the Akatsuki even further. How did they know their names or about Nagato's Rinnegan?

"Fine. But you better show me some of Danzo's moves."

"Obviously." The banter between the boys settled into silence, before they attacked their targets, each going into a different direction.

Xxxxxxxxx

DANZO VERSUS MIHARU

Danzo glared angrily across the clearing at me, while I now examined my finger nails in a bored manner.

"You insufferable brat! You ruined this! Everything I do is for the good of Konoha!" He said through gritted teeth. "You are an Uchiha! You dare turn traitor to Konoha?"

Danzo did not expect the boy to start laughing at him.

"AHAHAHAHAH! You actually think just because I'm an Uchiha I'm from Konoha? Well, I suppose you'd be right 99% of the time. At any rate, no. I actually plan to enlist there after I turn you into a stain on these trees. You're a fanatical zealot Danzo, and you cause more problems than you fix. And right after I finish killing you, I'm going to go tell Sarutobi about the horrible little things you do to children. He always did have a soft spot for kids huh? Man, they'll probably put your name right next to Madara as 'Konoha's biggest traitor'." I finished in a calm tone, an eerily quiet demeanor settling on me. "You will die here, Danzo. Both for the Uzumaki, and for the monstrosities you committed and would commit. Try not to die too quickly now, because I'm going to show you the gap between an A rank shinobi and an S ranked one."

Without warning, I rushed Danzo, all the while sending out two shadow clones to wait for an opportunity to end it in a single stroke. I engage him in the Interceptor Fist style of the Uchiha Clan. He had a height and reach advantaged, so I quickly kicked him away from myself, before flashing through handseals, ending with the Horse seal.

"Fire Style: Majestic Flame Destroyer!" I called out before unleashing a wave of flames at the Darkness of Konoha. Danzo's eyes widened, before he tried to use a vacuum style sphere to deflect the flames. He had mixed success, taking damage from the heat despite his redirection.

"Perfect. Thanks for the Jutsu, Danzo." I said cheekily, which prompted an angry growl from the older man.

"You're much too talented to be a child. Who are you?" He demanded in annoyance, all the while scanning for any sort of way to escape. 'I can't fight him head on if he's a fire user.'

"Wellllll, technically, I'm not a kid, but for some reason, I got isekai'd here. Funny how that works. Whatever, let's try something new. Tsukuyomi." Immediately, the world bled to red and black, a red moon hanging ominously in the sky above. Though for me, I'm still standing in the clearing while he gets this glassy eyed look on his face like an idiot. "So blah blah blah, this is the world of Tsukuyomi, I'm your god here, whatever. More importantly, as I just binged watched all 4 seasons of Lucifer like a week ago, I'm all about Ironic punishment. So for the next 72 hours, I'm going to show you all the ways your actions caused Konoha to crumble. Or until you tell me where your scroll of Vacuum style ninjutsu is. Maybe."

A second later, he screams, before falling to the ground.

"The scroll! It's kept on a shelf in my study! It was said to be written by a pupil of the Sage of the Six Path's, a man named Kazuma!" Danzo spoke to me through tear filled eyes.

"Oh spare me the water works, you fucking monster. And die." The two clones I had made earlier rushed Danzo, before forming Chakra Suppression seals on him, before they exploded. Shadow Clone Explosion was definitely an Itachi thing to use. I casually walked over to the crater left by my admittedly overboard execution of Danzo, but looking at his corpse made me feel all warm and fuzzy. Like punching a Nazi or a pedophile would.

"Welp, can't risk this coming back to fuck me over later sooooo...Fire Style: Searing Migraine!" I muttered before flipping through seals and firing the jutsu at Danzo's mangle body, leaving nothing but ashes.

"Either he was a bitch at this point in time or I'm too OP. Whatever, time to check on Tom."

I said to no one in particular, before shrugging and chakra jumping towards the noises of battle.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

The sounds of chaos were all around Tom Cat as he worked with Nagato to fight off Hanzo. He idly mused to himself that Hanzo must really hate nature, because he was cutting down more trees than an 1800s lumberjack. He shrugged as he jumped back, before flipping through the hand seals of a jutsu that would really annoy the old tyrant.

"Wood Style: Deep Forest Emergence!" He called out, before a mass of trees shot out of the ground around Hanzo, prompting the old ninja to growl, but before he could slice them down, he was blasted away by Nagato.

"Shinra Tensei!" The Uzumaki called out, before he leaned over a bit. The fight had been very chakra intensive. "I'm falling on my last legs chakra wise, new guy!"

"For the last time, my name is Tom Cat." Tom said in annoyance. Not for the first time since arriving here, he regretted how annoying his name had turned out to be. Why couldn't he have been a weeb like Miharu? That train of thought gave him pause. 'That might be the first time that string of words has ever been uttered.' He thought with some amusement. "Just hang on, Uzumaki. I'm going to show you how a Senju does things."

Hanzo climbed out of the now wrecked group of trees Tom had made, his clothes torn and his mask was damaged.

Tom paid him no mind, before he began flipping through a long sequence of hand seals, before pigment seeped across his face. As he felt the massive chakra flow build up around him, he couldn't help but grin, before opening his eyes to face Hanzo. "Sage Art, Wood Style: Shinsu Senju Veritable 1000 Armed Artifacts of the Buddja!" A giant statue of wood formed in the sky, momentarily blocking out the sun and casting a huge shadow over the battlefield. "You're good Hanzo, but you brought this on yourself. Goodbye"

Hanzo's eyes widened, before the statue attacked in earnest, thousand of wooden arms smashing into the battlefield around him. Tried as he might, he was not as young as he used to be, and eventually one arm hit him, causing him to tumble, before the rest of the them rained down upon him, ending the legendary ninja of Rain in an over the top fashion. When the shower of wooden arms ended, Tom dropped to knees, finally feeling the chakra drain on his new coils. The fight was over, prompting the remaining Akatsuki to rush over to where Nagato and Tom were.

Konan and Yahiko checked on Nagato, concern etched on their features. Tom looked around the clearing, before he scratched the back of his head sheepishly. He'd completely reshaped the landscape from a grassy clearing into a forest littered with craters. He was about to get up to go look for Miharu when he heard an obnoxious slow clap, which prompted him to sigh.

Xxxxxxxxxxxx

Miharu POV

After catching the tail end of the Tom's fight with Hanzo the Salamander, I couldn't help but be impressed. He fucked up that old man pretty bad, despite him being much stronger than Danzo. I had been really worried about Tom, but I guess I'd fretted over nothing. So naturally, I did what I usually do and masked my concern with mocking sarcasm.

"Braaaaaaavoooooo, brother dearest. I think you missed your calling as environmental landscaper." I drawled, before I offered him a hand, pulling him to his feet. "Thanks for letting me take that nutjob, by the way. Hitting him with Tsukuyomi was awesome. Plus, he told me where his vacuum style scroll was. Now, let's go borrow Nagato."

"You sure they'll go for it?" Tom asked a little skeptically, but I waved him off.

"Of course they will. We just saved their lives. They owe us, something I will be more than happy to remind them of."

Tom shot me a curious glance at my pragmatism, but nonetheless followed me over to the Ame Orphans. They locked eyes on us, but didn't say anything. So we just ended up staring at each other awkwardly for five minutes in utter silence. Eventually, Tom elbowed me to say something, prompting me to sigh.

"Soooo this may sound shitty, but I need to borrow Nagato for a couple days." That remark caused Konan and Yahiko to stiffened, before subtly shifting into defensive positions around their friend.

"Why do you need him? We won't let you kidnap him, pipsqueak." Konan said hotly, forming a paper sword in her left hand. I twitched at the pipsqueak comment, whereas Tom snickered.

"I need him to voice for our skill and character to your sensei Jiraiya, so he in turn will vouch for us to his own sensei. That's all."

Yahiko's brow furrowed in confusion and suspicion. "You know an awful lot about us. More than just some passing strangers should."

I just shrugged noncommittally. "Sure do. But if I was here to hurt you, I'd have just let Hanzo and Danzo-, okay their names rhyme. That's annoying..." Before I could go on a tangent, Tom nudged me in the ribs again. "Right. Yes, if I wanted you dead, I'd have waited till AFTER you'd fought off those two assclowns, because you'd have been easier prey." I finished coolly, before glaring at Tom in irritation. Why the hell was he making me do the talking? I'm the antisocial introvert, while he's the people person. Before I could voice this, I noticed the gears inside the Akatsuki's head turn. However, Nagato chose this time to speak up.

"Thank you for helping us. I was actually about to throw myself onto Yahiko's knife when you rescued Konan. We owe you a great deal, young one." Nagato said warmly, gratitude saturating his voice. "I would be happy to accompany you to Teacher's village."

"'Preciated. Because you're about to help me and numbnuts over there save the world." I said jovially, before jerking my thumb at my brother.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Two days later, Konoha Gate...

Nagato, Tom, and I strolled leisurely towards the main gates of the Village Hidden in the Leaves. My hands were placed behind my head, an annoyed expression on my face as I listened to Tom tell Nagato embarrassing stories about me. The older teen chuckled goodnaturedly, before he gestured for us to halt. None of us were surprised when a figure landed in front of us, given his immense chakra presence. The dust cloud surrounding the figure was a tad dramatic, though from the smile slowly building up on Nagato's face, I figured it was Jiraiya.

My suspicion was correct, as the man proceeded to strike a stupid-I mean gallant pose, before wrapping his first student in a hug. Tom and I just watched on awkwardly, not really sure how to deal with being around Jiraiya. Tom didn't like his perverseness and I hated Jiraiya because he was a shitty godparent.

"Nagato! It's great to see you after so many years! I had actually planned to come visit you guys next week to see how you've been doing." He said as he released his red-haired pupil, before his gaze subtly flicked to Tom and myself, eyebrow raising in curiosity. "I see you decided to take on students of your own."

I couldn't help it. I started laughing derisively. Tom had the decency to look embarrassed, but he let me have my moment. I was able to calm myself after a moment, before I locked eyes with the Toad Sage.

"Hardly, perv. Nagato here is just our character reference so we can join the Hidden Leaves. We need to speak to your sensei immediately, and what better way to get you on board than by saving your old student from Danzo and Hanzo the Salamander." I drawled in a bored manner. Partially because I had zero respect for Jiraiya, and partially because I was genuinely bored.

"Perv? Where do you get off-" Suddenly, Jiraiya froze, processing what I'd said, before turning to Nagato for confirmation. "What are they talking about, Nagato?! Are Konan and Yahiko okay?!"

That honestly threw me for a loop. It was odd seing Jiraiya as something other than the failure of a parental guardian he was in the show or the bitter old man with so many regrets. Still, I had zero empathy for the guy, so I just let him talk this out with Nagato.

"Yes, sensei. It's true. But these two actually helped us win. The dark haired Uchiha fought and killed Danzo, while the Senju assisted me in taking out Hanzo. His command over Wood style ninjutsu is incredible."

Immediately, Tom blushed and I yawned before smirking lazily at the Toad Sage as I activated my Sharingan. Call it petty, but antagonizing him might just end up being my new favorite hobby. He gaped at us, before walking over to us, before bowing gratefully.

"Thank you for saving my precious students. I owe you a debt I can never begin to repay." Jiraiya said genuinely, before raising his head to grin at us. "However, I have to ask how you know things you shouldn't. Because I'm sure that nobody except my teammates knew about Nagato and his friends being students of mine."

At his slightly accusatory tone, I was about to put him in genjutsu, but Tom stepped in.

"Lord Jiraiya, we will be happy to tell you our story in due time, but we must speak with your Hokage. Additionally, we are happy to comply with use of a Yamanaka to verify the claims we will make, but we cannot say anything while out in the open."

"You know how to give respect." Jiraiya said, a cheery grin on his face. "I like you. Definitely a lot more than the other brat."

I twitched, mentally debating the pros and cons of turning Jiraiya into a drooling vegetable with Tsukuyomi. I would totally use a Yaoi harem scenario too. That would show him.

Tom immediately jumped in the second I started chuckling darkly to myself. "I appreciate your kind words, Lord Jiraiya, but my companion and I really insist that we speak with the Hokage. Both about one of his shinobi instigating conflicts and about other matters of great importance."

Immediately, Jiraiya's expression turned serious, before nodding.

"Right. I know you said Danzo was involved, so we better go ahead and deal with this. Follow me."

The air took on a somber tone, as Jiraiya led us past the gates of Konoha. The village was bustling with activity, with vendors soliciting customers, and civilians walking to and from without a care in the world. Additionally, you could see ninjas jumping along the roof tops towards their destination, apparently in a hurry to get there.

"So welcome to the Village of Konoha, since this is the first time any of you have been here." Jiraiya stated with an attempt at warmth, but our situation was clearly weighing on his mind. "In a few moments, we'll arrive at the Hokage tower. Please don't make any sudden moves when we meet with Sensei. Some of his newer ANBU are a bit...overzealous."

I snorted, not really too worried about it, but Tom nodded back at the sannin, grateful for the advice. We continued down the main street of the village, walking past numerous restaurants, including the BBQ joint that Team Asuma liked to frequent in the anime. I shared a glance with Tom, who nodded subtly. My brother and I would be pigging out there after this meeting.

As Jiraiya lead us into the building, I began to feel a little anxious. Given the fact we'd either get accepted, or have to fight our way out of here, thus derailing my plans to fuck over Minato and Fugaku, it was a bit understandable. Eventually, we found ourselves outside the doors to the Hokage's office. With an annoyed sigh, I glanced at Tom.

"Welp, he were go."

xxxxxxxxxxxx

To Be continued...


	3. Chapter 3

**I actually started writing this fifteen minutes after posting the last chapter. Combination of boredom, and just using writing to decompress lol. Either way, if you're reading this, that means you've stuck around long enough to make it here. So welcome back. My cat appreciates you. Probably. Anyway, here's the story.**

**Chapter 3 or 'I like your red hair'**

General POV...

Silence. Dead Silence was Sarutobi's response to their tale. They told him about his past, the exact last words of the Second Hokage, and a whole bunch of other crap two seeming 12 year olds should have no fucking way of knowing. Sarutobi was notably troubled by the fact that two outsiders had killed one of his advisors, though he admitted that he'd let Danzo run around for too long unchecked. Furthermore, the fact that the dark haired one had the same eyes as Madara Uchiha and the silver haired Senju had the blood line of the First Hokage made matters complex. He looked at them, still struggling to think of something to say.

Xxxxxxx

Miharu POV...

I just watched with growing trepidation, subtly channeling chakra to my eyes in case I needed to use my Susano'o to protect Tom. I'd burn this village to the ground before they laid a hand on him. I was about to do something when Tom stepped before Sarutobi, before bowing deeply. I twitched a bit, not expecting my normie ass brother to pull off a perfect formal bow.

"Lord Sarutobi. Please. We did not come here to blackmail you or anything of the sort! We came to help bring peace to the Elemental Nations." Tom's earnest expression and demeanor caused Saurtobi's face to soften a bit.

"You have told me a great deal, young ones. I must say it is quite a lot to process. Dimensional travelers who also know the history of our land? It does seem a bit..."

"Crazy? Outlandish? Trust me. I was a therapist before I came here. If someone told me half the shit we have, I'd have personally written the recommendation to have them committed somewhere." I supplied helpfully, prompting a snort from Sarutobi and Jiraiya. Tom just elbowed me in the ribs. That was becoming an annoying habit of his. I wonder if using Tsukuyomi to have him stuck in 'It's a Small World' for 72 hours would get him to stop?

"Yes, something like that. However, I like to think I'm fairly adept at reading people. And you two, as crazy as you sound, are not lying. I must admit, I am not pleased with the actions my future self took. Piecemeal efforts to protect a vulnerable child and letting both Danzo and Orochimaru run amok? Unacceptable." Sarutobi paused, taking a large drag on his pipe, before setting it down on the table. "I'm assuming you have some sort of plan, or else you wouldn't be here. I also noted that you were very...evasive about who my successor was...Or would it be the past tense? This is rather confusing from a language standpoint."

I nodded to the famed Professor, before I stepped forward beside Tom. "As a matter of fact, I do. As crazy as this sounds, I don't think Orochimaru's path is set in stone yet. To that end, I want you to put Tom and I on his genin team. If he objects to taking us, mention that it might be good for him. Tom and I are both good enough that we would pique his interest. Plus, we can kill him if we need to. As for the third member, I request Kushina Uzumaki, the Jinchuriki of the Kyuubi." Upon hearing that, Sarutobi's brows furrowed.

"I understand your first point but why her?" At his question, I struggled to keep the blush off my face. Adult Kushina was goddess among women, and I sure as shit wasn't about to tell him I was going to wife that woman if it killed me.

"Besides the fact Woody here could suppress the Biju if it took over? Not to mention I will have the Eternal Mangekyo by this time tomorrow?" I subtly pumped my fist at my smooth response. 'Play it cool, Miharu.'

Upon hearing my perfectly reasonable response, he nodded. "Very well. I agree. That does complicate matters though, as I'd planned to place her on the team with both Minato Namikaze, our Acadamy's prize student along with Tsume Inuzuka."

"If I may, Lord Hokage..." Tom began hesitantly, though he flinched a bit when I glared at him, warning clear in my vision. "I would suggest placing Minato on Jiraiya's team, along with Mikoto Uchiha and Shibi Aburame. It would ensure both teams are entirely balanced for a variety of situations."

I nodded sagely, happy that my brother had finally accepted my master plan. "Also, there's a security concern."

At this, Jiraiya chose to butt in. "Besides the fact you killed one of the Hokage's advisers?"

I shot an annoyed glance at Jiraiya. "No, Pervy Sage. I'm talking about the fact that Kumo is going to try to kidnap Kushina Uzumaki very soon."

As soon as I finished, Sarutobi's visage went stony. "Kumo is going to what?"

"You heard me, Sarutobi. And I can prevent this from turning into an international incident, and get the Third Raikage under my thumb. But for that, I'm going to need Tsunade..." I paused, to pull a scroll from my sleeve and showed it to the rest of the room. "To exchange my eyes for the ones in this scroll. Preferably today. Also, if she could put my right eye into Tom's head, that'd be great."

Sarutobi sighed one more. "This is all turning out very troublesome."

Tom and I shared a grin. "Now you're sounding like a Nara." I commented casually, prompting yet another sigh from the Professor.

"Perhaps so. Jiraiya, go fetch Tsunade from the hospital. Tell her it's urgent."

Jiraiya nodded to his sensei, before he lept out the window towards the hospital.

"That's such an odd habit." Tom commented with fascination.

"Totally. But I guess using windows for dramatic exits are his least annoying traits." I replied casually.

"Very true."

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

One week later... Kushina Uzumaki's residence...

Tom and I were due to start the academy tomorrow, which was good, but we'd likely finish near the bottom due to not having attended the academy a day in our lives. I genuinely could not wait for some uppity student to call me a deadlast. I couldn't help but chuckle a little darkly, before I tugged at the Uchiha clan emblem on shirt. Sarutobi had pulled some strings with his old teammate Kagami Uchiha to induct me into the clan, as his illegitimate son, which apparently made me the new heir to the Uchiha Clan. That was a fucking crazy day, and I'm still being annoyed by my "family" about it. Fugaku Uchiha had taken it the worst, as he'd been attempting to speak to Kagami about courting his daughter, Mikoto. Speaking of her, she'd taken the news rather well. She wasn't that fond of Fugaku anyway, as his attempts at ingratiating himself with her were a rather obvious attempt at becoming clan head. Despite my status as the new heir, I'd avoided time in the Clan compound, and instead taken to sleeping in a tree above Kushina's house over the past week while my eyes healed from their surgery, as my Eternal Mangekyo rooted itself. Playing unseen guard dog to a girl who didn't know me was awkward as hell, but considering I'd been effectively blind for the past week, I didn't feel too much like a creep.

I'd also used this time to really evaluate my initial desire to get to know Kushina, but I realized that unless I told her everything, it wouldn't be fair to her at all, given the fact I knew things about both her and her future. I decided I would be honest with her, and then I'd let her make her decision. Either way, I felt better about the whole ordeal now than I had previously.

Suddenly, I felt a shift in my eyes, and somehow, I just knew they had finished recovering. Slowly, I removed the bandages around my eyes, and I was astounded by the sharp clarity with which I now saw the world. As someone who's required glasses since I was 11, and being unable to use contacts, it was a crazy sensation for the world to be that sharp. My frequent use of the Mangekyo over the course of my time here had already made me about as blind as I'd been before I came here. But now? Now I could see details I hadn't in years without the aid of lenses. I activated my Sharingan in order to commit the image to my memory. I was about to lean back when I caught movement towards Kushina's abode. Focusing my eyes, I saw it was the Kumo ninjas, just as I'd expected. They were...kind of creepy looking actually, now that I really looked at them. The scene in the anime had been rather hamfisted, so they'd kind of made the Kumo dudes sort of generic looking bad guys. That was sort of the case too, but these guys also gave off creeper vibes too. I silently began to follow them, waiting for my moment to strike with minimal effort. I watched with a clenched fist as they grabbed Kushina, but I told myself I needed to get them away from the village before I could enact my plan. That plan went out the window the second they stopped unexpectedly. The three of them tossed Kushina to the ground roughly, who just glared up at her attackers, defiance clear in her angry gaze.

"Wait here. Lord Raikage said she would be used to put Uzumaki blood and her special chakra into the Kumo clan's, right?" The first one spoke casually."We could go ahead and get a headstart right?"

My blood froze, anger beginning to fill me. I watched Kushina's face take on a horrified expression, before I sprung into action. I'd be damned if I let them rape her. It was one thing to know the implications of what would have happened to Kushina and Hinata had they been successfully kidnapped. It was another to actually hear it aloud. And while I couldn't kill these scumpiles, I could certainly hurt them. Then I'd make the Raikage kill them.

I landed among them, hands casually in my pocket, while forcing a bored expression on my face.

"Yeah, no. Sorry. Not gonna happen. Your not going to lay a hand on this girl's beautiful red hair." Hmm, probably shouldn't have phrased it like that, knowing her complex. Crap.

Of course, this just caused them to start laughing. "Little boy? You better get out of here, or we'll kill you. Don't try to play hero." The one who was in charge spoken in what he probably thought passed for menacing. His expression became confused when I started laughing.

"O-oh. Oh man. I'm sorry, I don't mean to be rude. But the fact you little minnows think you stand a chance against me is priceless. I'd your Raikage has a decent chance. Maybe Ay and Kirabi if I fought them together."

That caused them to go alert immediately. "How do you know the names of the children of the Raikage?!" Goon number 1 demanded angrily, before turning to his associates. "Change of plans. We're taking this one too. He knows things about our village, meaning Konoha has upped their spy game."

I snorted derisively, before interjecting. "Yeah, that's not gonna happen either. Well, at least in the way you think it is." I silently cast an ocular genjutsu with my Sharingan, effectively making them my puppets. Before I casually walked over to Kushina, before untying her and removing her gag. I also took the liberty of wiping her tears away. +10 cool points.

I wasn't expecting the sucker punch she threw at my stomach though. -11 cool points.

"W-Who are you?! I've never seen you in the village before!" She examined me suspiciously, before noticing my Uchiha crest. "Wait! Are you Mikoto's new brother?"

"Yep!" I wheezed out, as I lay hunched over on the ground. "That's me! Ow...Damn, woman, what are your hands made of? Bricks? Nice left hook you got there." I managed to grit out between the pain, tilting my head to see her expression, which seemed to be a mixture of embarassed and pleased, with a blush on her face. How stereotypical tsundere.

"S-shut up! I didn't know what you looked like or the fact your were an ally!" She replied angrily, pointing a finger accusingly at me.

I flipped over onto my back, staring up at her face. "Really, the fact I untied you AND knocked out your kidnappers didn't strike you as 'ally behavior'?" I shot back in annoyance. I'd forgotten that Kushina was really damn stubborn in the show.

"I-idiot! I didn't need you to rescue me!"

"So the fact you left a trail of your pretty red hair wasn't because you were slightly helpless?" She blushed again, before the rest of what I said registered. Then she got mad again.

"I totally had them where I wanted them!"

I sighed, before I pulled myself off the ground. I stood before her, before I pulled her into a hug. She stiffened in surprise, standing frozen in place.

"Look. I know you just went through something traumatic. What these assholes had planned for you was reprehensible, and while I'd like nothing more than to burn them alive with fire jutsu, I need your help, Kushina."

She immediately went on guard, "How do you know my name?" She demanded quickly.

"I can't tell you that right now. I promise I will tell you everything after I deal with the rest of this situation though. I will warn you. It's...a pretty crazy story and it will be a lot to process. But honesty is key, and I don't want to feel like I'm manipulating you into making certain choices. That's not my really not my intent. But, for now, I will tell you I also know about your little furry friend in your stomach." She froze again, before she began to try to pull away from me. I held fast. "And I also know that you're not him, and that you being a jinchuriki doesn't make you a monster, and it doesn't make you the Kyuubi. Well, his name is Kurama, but that's another story for another time."

When I finished speaking, she ceased struggling for about five seconds, before she wrapped her arms around me and began to squeeze the life out of me. After hearing my ribs start to creak, I tapped her shoulder, prompting her to realize she'd been squeezing too hard.

"I'm sorry! I just...I know how jinchuriki are treated in other villages, you know! And I get scared that will happen to me if anyone finds out!" She rambled off, her mouth running a mile a minute. "I also lost my parents and clan because of Iwa, Kumo, and Mizu, so I'm struggling to adapt here all alone, ya know?" Hm. Her speech impediment was pretty adorable actually. Naturally, I kept that to myself.

"I know, Kushina." I interrupted her by placing a finger on her lips gently, causing her cheeks to go a little red. "But you're not alone. You have Mikoto, and I guess me, since I don't really care if you have a big ass fox inside you or not. I know a thing or too about dealing with traumatic loss, okay? We can talk about that later. But right now, I need you to help me."

She looked up at me, curiosity evidence in her purple eyes. "What do you need me to do?"

"I need to get close to the Raikage, so I can put him under my genjutsu." I stated simply, though Kushina began to look skeptically.

"How the heck are you going to put a kage under a genjutsu? You're no older than me."

"As crazy as this sounds, I'm a lot stronger than my age would suggest. I could easily just kill him, but that would be counter productive to what I'm attempting to do." I explained patiently, though the age jabs were getting old fast.

"You speak as though you have some grand plan or something, ya know?" She questioned me, a skeptical expression on her face.

"Naturally. I'm going to bring peace to the world." I said evenly, while casually examining my finger nails.

A vein appeared on Kushina's forehead, before she smacked me on the head. "AND YOU THINK USING GENJUTSU ON A KAGE IS THE WAY TO DO THAT?!"

"OW! God, can you please stop hitting me on the head please? Your punches hurt a lot. And of course not. I have zero interest in working with the third Raikage to bring peace. He's a warmongering musclehead. No, my interest is getting his 17 year old son Ay in charge."

"How do you know Ay? He could be just as bad as his dad."

"No. While it's true there's speculation about his involvement in certain events, they don't fit his style, meaning his adviser's were probably to blame." I spoke without really thinking, before I took in her confused expression.

"What are you even talking about?" Kushina asked, annoyance heavy in her tone.

"Just...trust me I promise you I will tell you everything tomorrow. But for now, believe me when I say Ay is reasonable. His father is douchecanoe, and the world will be better off without him." I waved off her question, before turning to head off.

"Again. What are you talking about? You want my help, you explain to me at least something, ya know!" Kushina demanded, stomping over to me and poking my chest. I had honestly forgotten how stubborn she was supposed to be in the show. That made this tricky, particularly if the Raikage was around her like I suspected he might be.

"Okay, fine. I have an almost unbreakable genjutsu I can use, but it can't be used often. I-" I activated my EMS, causing Kushina to jump in fright, and to slightly cradle her head "have what's called an Eternal Mangekyo- Wait a second. Kurama is talking to you."

"How did you- Nevermind, he's screaming at you, ranting about your eyes and a man named Madara." She whimpered slightly, the fox's screams probably scaring her. I rush over to her, and gently hug her again.

"Hey hey hey, listen. I'm here, and I can help. But you have to look me in the eye, okay? I promise you Kushina. Nothing I do will hurt you, okay?" I feel her nod slowly against my chest, before she slowly lifts her head to look me in the eyes. I send chakra into my eyes, and I suddenly find myself inside an almost white room. I was about to call out for either Kushina or Kurama when I hear a roar behind me. I turn to see the Nine Tailed Fox, Kurama, in all his glory, chained to the ground by strict seals.

"Filthy Human! You have the same eyes as that bastard Madara!" Kurama roared in anger, struggling against the sealing to launch himself at me.

"Whoa there, big guy! I know you're a chakra being, but that cannot possibly feel good, Kurama."

Immediately, the fox froze, before he shifted his gaze to actually look at me.

"Human. How do you know my name?!" He demanded, anger beginning to seep back into his voice.

"I know many things. About the 10 tails, Kaguya, and the Sage of the Six Paths. Or as you know him, Father." The foxes eyes widened in surprised, before he ceased struggling entirely, though distrust still evident in his face. "I can prove to you, how I know all this, because, quite frankly, Bijuu are the only beings probably capable of understanding my situation. But I will have to use my Sharingan Genjutsu. But to prove this is not a trick, I, Miharu Uchiha, swear to gouge out my Sharingan eyes if I show you anything that is not false."

"A bold oath for an Uchiha. You lot value those eyes of yours above all else."

"I'm not really an Uchiha in the traditional sense, but you'll understand that in a second. Now, may I show you?"

"Fine. But make it quick, human."

"Gee, because you asked so nicely, furrball." At the foxes growl, I shook my head. "Fine, fine. Mangekyo Sharingan!" I yell, locking eyes with the fox, before sending him all the information of my memories, my life before ending up here, my plan to save the world, and even information about my world too.

About 10 minutes later, the foxes eyes uncloud, before he shifts his gaze back onto me.

"That was a wild ride, human."

"Right? The implications alone of this phenomenon are astounding-"

"Enough, I realize you were a nerd but spare me. I believe what you have shown me. And I know that you do not merely view my kind as weapons as others do. I thank you."

"Yeah well, I don't like people who make snap judgments of other people without getting to know them. I know my knowledge of you is a little...different, but I'd like us to friends."

"...You're expecting me to show her everything in her sleep tonight, aren't you?" Kurama asked dryly. "Though, if you did, you could convince her to loosen this seal up abit. Having nails in my hands is not a fun existence."

"In order: preferably and yes. I will talk to her about the seal though, assuming you promise to behave?" Kurama nodded at my prodding, before I continued. "So there you have it. Now stop comparing me to Madara. I hate that dick."

"And yet, you use mostly his techniques and his eyes."

"Technicalities. Shut up. And please? Be gentle with the memories." I then closed my eyes, attempting to sever my flow of chakra invading Kushina's system.

Before I could hear the fox's probably sarcastic response, I was suddenly locked in eye contact with Kushina. Which was really **really** awkward.

"Um, hi." She said in an uncharacteristically shy voice.

"Yes, hello, Kushina. Kurama stopped screaming in your head now, right?"

She didn't reply verbally, but she did nod slowly.

"Okay, good. Now, I wanted you to loosen his seal a little bit. He just wants to not have iron nails in his hands and a little bit of freedom. You could probably even learn to summon him, eventually. Don't let the big bad fuzzball confuse you. He's a sweetheart." I said with a gentle smile, before I noticed her vision glaze over a bit.

"I don't know what this means, but he said to shut up or he'll tell me about 'that'. Whatever that means." She said innocently, before smiling at me.

I paled a bit, before nodding. "Right, well, being partners with your tailed beast will definitely help you on your way to becoming Hokage."

"Um, that's great, but how'd you know I want to be Hokage, ya know?" She asked before narrowing her eyes, "You're not making of fun of me are ya?!"

"Of course not, Kushina. I wouldn't make fun of someone's dreams." I said placatingly. "Now look. We need to get moving. It's just a hunch, but I'm pretty sure that the Raikage himself might be involved in this-" Suddenly, I felt a massive chakra spike in the distance, and something heading with immense speed in our direction. "Kushina! Get behind me. And create a defense barrior seal formation around yourself, okay? The Raikage is heading our way."

She nodded hesitantly, before she pricked her finger and began writing seal formulas in the ground. A purple barrier then sprung around her, with her sitting safely inside it.

A couple seconds later, a massive dark skinned man barreled into the clearing they were in. He flicked his eyes around the clearing, before settling his gaze on both Kushina and myself. He began to crack his neck as eh stood to his full height.

"You, boy. You have something that belongs to my village-"

"Actually, Captain Dickhead, that girl doesn't belong to anyone but herself. And before you go all monologue-ing villain on me, tell me something. Do I have pretty eyes?" I interrupted. I've seen way too many animes with drawn out villain speeches. I ain't doing that shit again.

"What are you talking about-" He started but he made the mistake of looking in my eyes, putting him at my mercy.

"Kotoamatsukami." I whispered, letting my all powerful genjutsu take hold of his mind. I watched him stiffen, before he looked around wondering why he was here.

"Oh you're the one who I spoke to with the Leaf." He then walked over to his unconscious minions, before activating his lightning armor technique, while combining it with his black lightning. Luckily, I had my Sharingan still active, so I got another move from an idiot. My quest to literal godhood takes another step, apparently. "Yes, I agree, my decisions of late have been out of my character, so I think it's best for me to put Ay in charge. And don't you worry, I'll put that pesky council of advisers in its place. I'll send Ay and Bee with the formal treaty after Ay's inauguration in a few months. Tell your Kage that he can use that to call a Five Kage Summit, if he wants."

"Uh, cool."

"Indeed. Now, if you excuse me, I have to go dump all my responsibilities on my son and then go enjoy my retirement in the Land of Waves. I hear it's pretty this time of year. Raikagee AWAYYYYYY!" And with that, he lept into the tree line in what I assume was the direction of Kumo.

Well, I guess I don't have to worry about Gato down the line?

I turned to look at Kushina, who was as baffled as I was, still sitting comfortably in her little chakra barrier. She honestly reminded me of a fairy tale for some reason.

"You can let that down now, Princess. He won't be coming back." I stated reassuringly, to which she nodded, albeit hesitantly.

"How can you be so sure though? And what exactly did you do to him?" She asked hesitantly as she walked to up me. "You won't do that to me, will you?"

I glance at her appearance, and she looks genuinely worried that I'll use my Kotoamatsukami on her. I shake my head, before I offer her a smile. "I did that as a means to prevent him from retaliating on Konoha because I stopped them from kidnapping you. Because that guy, weird as he is, is also pigheaded and doesn't like being thwarted. So I planted the seed in his head that this was secretly a request from our Hokage to test our villages security system. I don't exactly know what sparked the Third Shinobi War, but I figured this was one of the catalysts. I can't fully explain everything, but I promise nothing I ever do will ever hurt you, Princess." I spoke with as much sincerity as I could shove into my monotone ass voice. Apparently it only got worse since I was now in an Uchiha body, which have a seeming genetic predisposition to being broody monotonous introverts. Tom jokes that I didn't change that much since I got this body. I shot a fire ball at him in response. Obligatory retaliation. I shake my head from thoughts, before refocusing on Kushina. She had turned away from me for some reason. "Um, Kushina?"

"Y-yes! What do you need?" She stammered in response.

"Did you hear me?" I asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Oh, yes. I won't lie and say I'm not curious about your secrets...but you saved me from a fate worse than death. And for that, I will always be grateful to you." I was about to wave her off, when suddenly, she was beside me, planting a kiss on my cheek.

has encountered an unexpected variable and must shut down. Please contact Microsoft Support- ERROR, ERROR.

I slap myself in the face, prompting a look of concern from the blushing girl beside me.

"Um, should I not have done that? I'm sorry ya know!"

"NO! GOD, NO IT'S FINE!" I practically shout. "Just, totally unexpected. Very, VERY unexpected. It's cool! I'm cool. Totally. Uh, what were we talking about again?" I try to strike a suave pose, but I end up just looking like an awkward ass hedgehog. "Um, for the future? Can you...hold off from stuff like that until after you talk with Kurama tonight? I'll feel lot less...creepy."

She nodded, before she closed her eyes and settled in.

"Um, could you take me home, I really dirty and I'm low on chakra. I want to get in my pjs and go to sleep, ya know?" She was still redfaced, though my awkward demeanor seemed to amuse her a bit, given the way she was softly laughing every now and then. "I do have some questions before you walk me home."

"Uh...what's that?"

"How strong are you, exactly? And what is Kurama going to talk to me about?" She half asked/demanded.

"Uh...in reverse order, my secrets and some stuff about this world, and information about me, so it's not just me with a bunch of information on you. As for the second question, you ever hear of a guy named Hanzo the Salamander?"

"Um, isn't he like super strong? Like S rank."

"Yeah. I sort of helped kill him. Kinda. Well, I was actually killing this other dickhead named Danzo."

"Are they brothers?" Kushina asked curiously. It was a fair question.

"No, I think they just bonded over having rhyming names and being assholes." I mused aloud, though it was something I'd thought about before.

"That's weird."

"Totally."

"Okay. Can you take me home now, I'm really sleepy." She stated tiredly, before she almost fell over. I caught her, before she smiled tiredly at me, before nestling herself in my arms.

Well, shit. I'm trying hard to keep from influencing her and I keep making it worse. This sucks.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

To be continued...

**Two in less than 24 hours? I must be on roll. Whatevers. Enjoy people. **

**Raizen out!**


	4. Chapter 4

**I'm writing this again like 14 hours after my last chapter. For some ungodly reason, history is repeating itself with the way I wrote No Hero Academia. Meaning multiple updates in a week until my creative juices subside again. Nifty.**

**This is the reworked version of the third chapter. To the anonymous reviewer, I really wanted to thank you. While your review was less than positive, you made me aware of how my story was originally coming across as, which was definitely NOT my intention. To that end, I've reworked somethings in hope of it playing out better.**

**Chapter 4 or, "Team Meetings"**

Miharu/Tom's apartment, morning...

I groaned as I heard Tom shuffling around, doing something at 6 in the morning. I didn't get home until after midnight. Kushina had latched onto me after she passed out. I only was able to escape using substitution jutsu. She still had my freaking shirt though, so that's going to be an awkward conversation. I rolled back over, trying to obtain a few more minutes of precious sleep and warmth. That went out the window when I heard Tom open my door.

"Get up, or you're gonna be late." He said casually. I opened on eye in annoyance to see him eating a bowl of cereal with an amused expression on his face.

"It's the Academy, and I'm literally an S Rank shinobi. Those genin can fuck off." I grumbled irritably, before I sat up, still wrapped in my cocoon of blankets, my Sharingan spinning as I glared at Tom.

"Yes, but you have to show up for the final exams or all those skills won't be crap if you're still just an itty bitty civilian."

I went quiet at that, because he a point. I then tried to get off the bed, only to faceplant because my legs were still wrapped up in my cocoon. Tom apparently found this hilarious, before he saw an annoyed Mangekyo glaring out from the hole where my face should be. He ceased laughing immediately. He knew how evil and creative I could be, and giving me the ultimate genjutsu tool made him wary of annoying me before I had coffee.

Tom watched awkwardly, before he left me in my snuggly prison. I groaned, before I began to wiggle my way to the door. I made it into the hallway before they were lose enough for me to get out of. I then proceeded towards the bathroom, and by extension, the shower. After alllowing the water to heat up, I stepped in, before deciding to sit down and let the droplets fall against me. Today would be the day Tom and I would be formally introduced to Kushina's generation. The genin exams were apparently this afternoon, meaning I'd have to sit through review lectures all morning since classes started at 7 in the morning. I palmed my face in annoyance, before I had a startling realization. Kushina might not be able to the the regular Clone Jutsu. Shit. I immediately stood to my feet, before completing my hygiene as fast as possibly, before rushing out of the bathroom.

I made it to my room in our apartment before Tom chose to see what was happening.

"Why are you rushing around like a bat out of hell? We can literally just use the Flying Thunder God to get there quite literally in a flash." He commented idly, not seeing the rush.

"I don't give a shit about being late. Kushina might not have the control for the clone jutsu!" I shot back in annoyance, though I'd forgotten we could use the Second Hokage's variant of the Hiraishin without much issue.

"Ohhhhh. I see. That's a valid concern. So what exactly are you going to do?" Tom asked curiously from the doorway.

"I'm going to attempt to teach her water clones, since I'm at least...70% sure that's her element, and if that doesn't work? Shadow clones."

"I would say the shadow clones are the safer bet, given Naruto was able to learn them fairly easily. Also, before I forget, here." He finished before he tossed me a scroll, which I caught easily. Upon seeing my raised eyebrow, he decided to elaborate. "It's a scroll of Genjutsu written by Izuna Uchiha. Madara gave it to us, remember?"

"Oh. Right. That." I'd honestly forgotten about it. I had really just planned to work on breaking down the secret of the Black Lightning while Kushina worked on the clones- Wait. That was it. A way to fulfill my social obligations AND do whatever the hell I wanted. I immediately crossed my hands into a familiar hand seal.

"Multi-Shadow Clone Jutsu!" Two puffs of smoke later, and I was looking at two mirror images of myself. I nodded in approval, before I pointed at the one on my left. "You, transform into Kushina, before heading to the academy with Goody Two-shoes over there."

"How do you know I won't just send a Wood Clone?" Tom asked with mild irritation, tapping his foot impatiently. "Better yet, how do you know I won't rat you out?"

"Because you're too damn noble to do so. Plus, you wouldn't want to get Kushina in trouble, right?" I asked in a casual manner, though I could see the gears spinning in his head.

"Fine, but I won't cover for you if you try this with Orochimaru."

"Don't care. That's future Miharu's problem." I replied evenly, finishing donning my clothes, before I opened my window, and jumped out of it.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

10 minutes later, Kushina's residence...

I landed in front of her house, before I walked to her front door. I knocked politely, which prompted annoyed and sleepy grumbles from inside. A few seconds later, a disheveled Kushina opened the door, looking very much like she'd just woken up.

"What do you want, Miharu? I have to be at the academy soon and-" She said tiredly, still rubbing the sleep out of her eyes. I refused to let myself be distracted by her cuteness.

"How's your clone jutsu?" I interjected suddenly, which made her eyes go wide with mild horror.

"Oh crap! I meant to practice it last night, ya know!" Kushina said frantically, before she suddenly remembered what happened last night. "That wasn't a dream, was it? You're really from another world? And that was really my life I saw, or at least, a potential branch? I really married that sissy Minato?"

"Afraid not. Everything was very much real. I'm sure you have questions for me/want to beat the shit out of me. Luckily, I managed to buy us until this afternoon to practice some alternatives."

"How did you manage that?" She asked curiously, tilting her head to the side in a cute manner while also not denying that she wanted to inflict bodily harm on me.

"I used shadow clones, and had one transform into you." I replied, while trying to look as nonchalant as possible. Kushina got stars in her eyes, and immediately got in my face.

"THAT'S SO COOL, YA KNOW!" She said in excitement, before she clasped her hands together in front of her. "Please teach me! I mean, you kind of owe me."

I was reminded a bit of Naruto for a moment, before I let a small smile slip onto my features. "I'd be happy to. Now, I can teach you water clones, if that's your chakra element, or I can show you shadow clones, which you can use to help you train. It's up to you. But first, I think it's better for us to address the proverbial elephant in the room."

Kushina took on a thinking pose, her eyes squinting as she considered her options. Once again, I had to stop myself from headpatting this girl.

"Okay. So my first question, is am I really just a fictional character?" She asked, insecurity lacing her tone.

"You were in my world, but you are very much real here. So don't worry too much about that, because that will lead me to question my existence too."

"Okay, did I really marry Minato? And why did you save me in his place?" Her voice took on an accusatory tone. "We're you trying to manipulate me into loving you?"

It was a brutal question, but I could easily see how she'd think that. While I had initially had zero qualms about screwing up the timeline to impress Kushina, I realized that was selfish.

"No. While I freely admit, I had the biggest fictional character crush on you for a long time, I didn't intervene because of that."

"Then why?"

"That's a little complicated, but while the original show glosses over it, the subtext behind your kidnapping and one that happens later was pretty grim. Plus, I always thought it was weird that such an important mission would be given to mere chunin, so I took Minato's place in case the Raikage or some other high rank Kumo ninja was involved. That's all." I explained tiredly, realizing how selfish my original plan had been.

"Then why'd you say my hair was pretty like Minato said?" She asked, a curious tone in her voice.

"Because it is. Your hair is something I think you should be proud of. It's a mark of both your clan, and sets you apart from others. I also knew it was a huge insecurity for you, so I wanted you to start to see it could be a positive trait."

"So, just to clarify, you were not attempting groom me to be your wife?"

"Despite my initial excitement at the prospect of potentially having a shot with my anime crush, I realized that I had an unfair amount of information about you that wouldn't have made it a fair process to you. So I both leveled the playing field by giving you information about me, the world at large, my plans, and ultimately letting you decide about your future. My brother and I have already derailed the timeline extensively, and eliminated three major causes of issues in the show already. You can live freely as you want, without fear of eventually dying to Kurama." I finished with a shrug, letting her process everything I'd said.

"I appreciate you being honest with me, and not just treating me like I'm some kind of trophy to be won. I admit, everything you told me was...a lot to handle, but I trust you, ya know?"

"I appreciate it. Still, I want to be very clear, Kushina. As much as I loved your character in the show, I won't let that impact my friendship with you. I saved you because it was the right thing to do. Not to instill some kind of gratitude to me. I'd have done the same for anyone else."

The explanation left a brief silence between us, before she clapped her hands.

"Right! So you said you can help me with my clone jutsu! Can you show me the shadow clones? Last night showed me that I really need to get stronger." Her driven demeanor was still unsurprising given what I knew about her reputation as the Red Hot Habanero, but it was inspiring nonetheless.

"Of course. So to use the shadow clone jutsu, you have to place your hands into two half ram seals, and then cross them like this." I demonstrated quickly, forming the hand seal. "Shadow clone jutsu!"

A poof of smoke later, and there was one more Miharu in the clearing with us.

Kushina was staring rather intently at the clone, before she began to circle and poke him, much to our embarrassment.

"Can you not do that please?" My clone asked her in embarrassment, causing her to jump back in fright.

She pointed a finger at it accusingly. "IT CAN TALK!"

I dragged a hand down my face at her denseness. "Right, I forgot I showed you what I knew about your life, not specific Jutsu mechanics. To answer your question? Yes, yes it can. Shadow Clones are sentient, and everything they experience, you experience." I explained calmly, reminding myself that she was still an Academy student, and not the S rank shinobi she would become.

Apparently, her mind went to some pervy places, if the slight nosebleed and reddened cheeks were any indication. A few seconds later, she slapped her cheeks before rushing in front of me.

"So I can learn this and use this to get super strong?" Kushina asked excitedly, bouncing on her feet a little as she stood in front of me.

"Yep. The jutsu itself is pretty easy. It's only a kinjutsu because of its high chakra cost." I explained gently. "Why don't you give it a try now?"

The stars in her eyes returned, and she immediately ran a few feet away, eager to try her new jutsu. She formed the cross seal, and her chakra flared. Before she called out "Shadow Clone Jutsu!"

A poof of smoke flooding the clearing and when it cleared, a disfigured clone of Kushina stood in front of her. She dropped her head a bit, before turning angrily towards me, her hair rising like tails a bit. "I thought you said it was easy!"

"I did. But it's highly unlikely you'd master it on your first try." I said while biting my hand to keep from chuckling. I stopped, however, when I saw how dejected Kushina looked at her failure. "Hey, look. I'm not trying to play a trick on you, okay? I know that you feel all alone in this village without your family. But I promise I will never hurt you or control you. You're my friend. Okay, Kushina?"

She sighed, before she nodded her head. She took on a look of determination before she formed the cross seal, and tried again. "Shadow Clone Jutsu!" This time, the clone was only slightly discolored, but was other wise function.

"That was better! At this rate, you'll have it down within the hour." I said warmly, offering a smile of encouragement at her. She blushed at the praise, before she lightly slapped her cheeks.

"Alright! I can do this, ya know! Just watch and see! It won't be long before I surpass you too, Miharu!"

I shook my head, but said nothing. I walked over to a nearby tree and sat down. I discreetly made a few shadow clones of my own, bidding them to work on using Black Lightning, before I pulled out Izuna's genjutsu scroll, and began to quietly read in silence. I would periodically flick my gaze over to Kushina as she worked hard at mastering the technique.

It was around 11 AM that Kushina yelled to get my attention.

"Miharu! Look, look!" Her excited voice came from both my left and right, causing me to look up from my reading, only to see two Kushinas beaming happily at me.

"I see you got the hang of making Shadow Clones, Princess. Well done." I commented with a bit of pride. She had mastered it in a short span of time.

"Hehe. Sure did! I bet you're super impressed with me." The fact both clones were speaking in unison was a little creepy, but I decided to let her have her moment. Both the clone and the original were brushing imaginary dirt off their shirts. That was until their stomachs began to rumble loudly, prompting both to turn scarlet with embarrassment.

"I am. So how about I treat you to lunch to celebrate? Anywhere you want." I offered casually, a slight edge of nervousness building up, which I tried to avoid by staring at the scroll in my hands.

"Really? Are you sure, Miharu? Wouldn't it be odd for the Uchiha Heir to been seen eating with the outsider?" Kushina asked timidly, but I simply waved her off.

"I'm technically the real outsider here, remember?" I replied, before I remembered the lives of other Jinchuriki. "The people of this village are sheep. They follow the general consensus without bothering to form their own individual opinions." I muttered darkly, causing her to look at me with mild concern. If only she knew what they were capable of.

"Miharu? Why would you say something so...pessimistic?" She and her clone asked me simultaneously, each placing a hand on my cheek, trying to tilt my head up to look at them. I still refused to look at her.

"It's nothing. Where do you want to eat?" I asked, hoping she'd pick up on the fact I didn't want to talk about it.

She looked like she wanted to say something, but she held her tongue, instead answering my question. "Well...I've never had that many friends, so I was hoping to go to social meal place like that BBQ place?" She said a little hesitantly. "It's okay if you don't want to, I know it's expensive-"

"It's fine. I'm the heir to the Uchiha Clan, technically. I can just have them forward the bill to my clan." I said, waving off her concern. I stood up, rerolling the scroll and tucking it up my jacket sleeve, feeling the seal array activate before taking it in. I began to head back in the direction of the village. I stopped when I realized Kushina wasn't following me. I turned around, to see her and her clone, looking at me strangely.

"What's wrong, Kushina?" She didn't say anything, but her hair shadowed her eyes, before she and her clone began walking towards me. I felt the hairs on the back of my neck stand up a bit, but before I could voice my concern, I felt two pairs of lips on my cheeks, before the one on the right poofed away. I struggled to formulate words, while she suddenly found the dirt really interesting.

"Right. Thank you, Kushina. But what was that for?"

"For being truthful about everything when you could have just as easily manipulated me with what you knew about me as a person. I would like to get to know you though, beyond your own memories, ya know?"

I couldn't help but let a small smile form on my face. "If that's what you want, Kushina. Now, lunch?" She nodded her head furiously, so much so I was worried she might shake her head off. I sighed, but I was glad to have made a new friend in this bizarre and crazy world.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxx

Yakiniku-Q, 20 minutes later...

The BBQ place was surprisingly empty, which was pretty odd given the fact it was time for the lunch rush to kick up. As Kushina and I waited to be seated, I casually made a couple shadow clones to go retrieve the Vacuum style scroll from Danzo's house, and get to work on mastering it. Kushina had noticed this, and gave me a conspiratory thumbs up, correctly assuming my plan to have them do some training. Other than that though, we sat in mostly comfortable silence while we waited to be seated, since the place had a policy against self seating. I opened my mouth to say something, when the memory of my clones at the academy hit me. Tom had gone off to kill time until the exam, whereas Minato and Mikoto had approached me to join them for lunch. My clone had been run out of chakra before he could answer. That...would require some explaining. Crap. Though, the fact they were hanging out together was a little odd. They definitely seemed closer here than they were in the show.

I shook my head from the memory feedback, but before I do anything else, the restaurant entrance opened, and there stood Mikoto and Minato. Their eyes widened a bit at recognizing us, before they walked over to us.

"Kushina! I was wondering why you seemed distracted in class today. Still having issues with the clone jutsu?" Mikoto asked her best friend, an edge of concern in her voice.

"Oh! Yeah I was a little worried, but I realized at this point there is no point in beating myself up about it." Kushina replied nervously, fidgeting slightly with the hem of her kimono top.

"That's a mature way to see it, but I'm sure you'll do fine, Kushina." Minato said reassuringly, with Mikoto nodding in agreement. Then, their attention turned to me.

"Ah, so this was where you disappeared to. We were wondering what happened to you." Mikoto said a little too happily.

Uh oh.

"Uh yeah, I wasn't feeling well, so I wanted to experiment with a new type of teleportation jutsu." I replied evenly, trying to use my monotone voice to mask my apprehension.

"You know, it's pretty rude of you that you've been avoiding staying with our family, even though you're the new heir, Miharu. One might think you're ashamed of your new family." I have to give her credit. Mikoto was definitely going for the kill.

"Not at all. I just live with my adopted brother. He and I have been through so much, that we just decided living together made sense. I'm flattered that Lord Uchiha acknowledged me as his offspring and heir. I've just needed some time to come to terms with it, yeah?"

Mikoto nodded her head, apparently satisfied with my response. The greeter chose this time to return, before leading us to a table, with Mikoto and Minato now tagging along. Minato sat beside me, while Mikoto sat beside Kushina. Silence settled among our group as we browsed the menu, though I noticed that Kushina was whispering furiously with Mikoto, and they were both glancing at Minato and myself. When I looked at him for an explanation, he just shrugged.

Shaking my head, I returned my attention to my menu, at least until they took our orders.

I ordered a lot of beef, Minato ordered pork and beef, Mikoto chose chicken, and Kushina ordered pork with a side bowl of ramen.

The three of them made idle small talk for awhile, before they realized I'd been simply observing rather than participating in the conversation.

"So, Miharu..." Mikoto began a little too casually. This didn't bode well. "I noticed you were here with Kushina before we showed up. Were you two on a date?" She asked me bluntly, her eyes reflecting mischief.

Immediately, I choked on my tea, coughing violently due to the unexpected question.

Kushina blushed crimson, before she grabbed Mikoto. "H-Hey! What makes you think I'd be interested in someone as broody as him, ya know!"

I felt my eye twitch, but I didn't say anything. She had the decency to look guilty at insulting me, though.

I just shook my head, before looking Mikoto in the eyes. "While I certainly wouldn't say no, I'm pretty sure she's practically royalty. Related to the wife of the First Hokage, and the heiress of the Uzumaki Clan in Konoha? I may be the future head of the Uchiha Clan, but I don't think I'm nearly good enough for someone as amazing as Kushina. Plus, we don't really know each other that well yet, though I do consider her a friend."

Their reactions varied. Minato's eyes kept darting between Kushina and myself, Kushina seemed to have a blush and what appeared to be a ghost hanging out of her mouth, and Mikoto was reading me with her Sharingan for any sign of deceit.

I turned my head back to the window, content to be uninvolved with the rest of the conversation. I occasionally felt Minato's gaze on me, but otherwise, the meal went by uneventfully.

Xxxxxxxxxxx

Konoha Ninja Academy, the next day...

Tom and I had arrived on time at the academy, we casually entered the building. I was still wearing my black hoodie with the Uchiha logo and grey ninja pants, while Tom had taken to wearing an outfit similar to the one Kimmimaru Kaguya had worn in the first season of Naruto. My forehead protector was worn around my neck like a necklace, while Tom had his covering the Sharingan in his right eye socket, in much the same manner that Kakashi had worn his.

Today was the day we'd get our team assignments, though the guesswork for us was nonexistent, given that we'd essentially strong-armed the Hokage into giving us the team we wanted. We made our way through the building, before we entered into classroom 3-A. Immediately, conversations in the room stopped, as everyone in the classroom turned to look at us. My brother and I had very different reactions. He checked his watch to make sure we were on time, whereas I raised an eyebrow and a mocking grin at the rest of them, letting my Sharingan spin wildly. I'd taken to leaving it activated permanently as a Chakra exercise, though this had the side effect of creeping people out. Not that I really cared about that. Tom and I had managed to get top scores in yesterday's performance, a fact which annoyed quite a number of our "classmates", because it placed us near the middle in class rankings. I scanned the crowd for the noteworthy individuals.

As expected, Kushina, Minato, and Mikoto were all present. Other notable names included the Ino-Shika-Cho trio, Shibi Aburame, Tsume Inuzuka, and lastly, Hiashi and Hizashi Hyuga. At least, that was the only people I recognized. The rest were unimportant in my opinion.

The chunnin teacher chose this time to arrive, cutting off any potential outburts our arrival might have caused. We casually made our way to the top row of the classroom, before we sat down and waited to hear our assignments.

The chunin coughed a bit to get the classes attention, before he began to read of the list.

"Congratulations on passing the Genin exam. From this moment forward, you are now proud Shinobi of the Hidden Leaf Village. Wear your headbands with pride. Now, for the team assignments..."

At this point, I leaned back in my chair, because I already knew the outcomes.

"Blah blah blah, Team 4 is Kushina Uzumaki, TomCat Senju, and Miharu Uchiha, under Orochimaru of the Sannin. Blah blah bleah...Team 7 is Minato Namikaze, Mikoto Uchiha, and Shibi Aburame, under Jiraiya of the Sannin. Team 8 is Tsume Inuzuka, Hiashi Hyuga, and Hizashi Hyuga under Tsunade Senju. Team 9 is still in circulation from last year, Team 10 is Inoichi Yamanaka, Shikaku Nara, and Chouza Akamichi, under the instruction of Sakumo Hatake. Please wait here for your Jounin teacher to collect you."

Immediately, the class went and met up with their teammates. Well, the rest of them did. I just closed my eyes and tried to nod off for a few minutes. Tried being the key word here, because about four seconds after shutting my eyes, I felt someone's gaze on me. I open my eyes to find Kushina Uzumaki staring me in the face, her face a mask of silent contemplation.

"Um, Tom? Was she there like, four seconds ago?" I break eye contact with the Uzumaki heir, to glance at my brother, who was doodling on a piece of paper.

"Dunno. Busy." Ugh, useless. At least his multi-tasking is getting better, if he can speak while performing tasks now.

I turn my head back to face the undeniably cute red-haired girl in front of me, her eyes searching mine.

"Why aren't you putting me in genjutsu?" She asked suddenly, derailing any potential explanations I could have thought of.

"What."

"What aren't you putting me in a genjutsu?" She repeated, as if her question wasn't so random that it made zero sense.

"I-Why would?" I shot back, baffled by the question.

"Because you're really good at them. And I know you like to mess with people. So I wondered if I stared at you long enough to annoy you, you'd put me in one, ya know?"

"I-Kushina, just sit down please. You're making the rest of the class stare." Indeed, the entirety of their class was watching their interaction with interest. Really? Are their lives REALLY that uninteresting?!

She seemed to consider it a moment, before she shook her head stubbornly.

"I don't want to. I want you to put me in a genjutsu." She stated once again.

"You know what? Fine." I flipped through hand seals, before a number of feathers fell from the ceiling, causing our classmates to faceplant the desks one by one. Tom shook himself before resuming his artistry, whereas Kushina was now sprawled across the desk snoring.

I sighed in annoyance, but before I could wake her, I felt a presence appear behind me.

"Kukukuku. Well, aren't you interesting. That's a B rank area of effect genjutsu." Came the silky smooth voice of the Snake Sannin Orochimaru. I tilt my head back to look him in the eye, my Sharingan meeting his reptilian yellow eyes. "And a permanently active Sharingan. Even more intriguing."

I shrug, before I reached out to Kushina's forehead, and used two fingers to send a pulse of chakra to wake her up. Then I channeled some lightning chakra and poked Tom in the ribs, shocking him slightly, prompting him to let out a shriek.

"Why'd you-Oh, Orochimaru, sir! I'm sorry, I sometimes get distracted when I draw."

The snake sannin chuckled a bit, before patting Tom on the shoulder. "It's not a problem. I took get sucked into whatever I'm working on. So long as it doesn't happen on missions, it's completely fine." Orochimaru pointed out gently, a stark contract from the monster Tom and I knew he could become. Before Tom could respond, Kushina slowly pushed herself off the desk, before rubbing the sleep out of her eyes, before her eyes widened comically at the sight of their sensei being present. She immeidately stood on the desk, before bowing towards him.

"Orochimaru-sensei! It's an honor to meet you, sir! I look forward to learning under you, ya know!" She rattled off words in rapid succession. It was actually pretty impressive.

Orochimaru chuckled once more, before patting her on the head.

"I must admit, my first impression of you is rather positive. You're all much more interesting that I thought you'd be." He commented with amusement, before he pushed himself off the wall. "Come along now, let's go someplace quiet so we can have proper team introductions."

He teleported away as soon as he finished speaking, but I felt his chakra signature on the roof. I sighed, before placing a hand on both Tom and Kushina, and warped to the marker we'd placed on the roof a few days ago.

"And some advanced knowledge of fuinjutsu as well. If I'm not mistaken, that was the Second Hokage's incomplete jutsu. How very intriguing." It might have been careless, but I wasn't really that concerned about letting things slip. The more I intrigued Orochimaru, the less likely he was to go bonkers and start dissecting orphans. Probably. Hopefully. Maybe.

"Oh trust me, Orochimaru-sensei. I've got tons of tricks up my sleeves. And so do they." I replied smoothly, before gesturing to my teammates behind me, though this was slightly diminished by the fact Kushina looked like she was about to puke from the sudden space time transportation.

"I'm sure they do, little Uchiha. But it's you who interests me the most. Because you see, you remind me of someone." He commented in that silky tone of his, his eyes watching me with interest.

"Oh? Who would that be sensei?" I asked, though I had a feeling I already knew his answer.

"Why, myself of course. But we can talk about that later." He clapped his hands suddenly, before he motioned for us to get comfortable. Tom took a seat, though his gaze kept flicking over to me, probably in part due to the Snake Sannin's comment. Tom always was a worrywort. Was I a little edgy and dark? Sure. Did I happen to do my undergrad capstone essay on Phillip Zimbardo? Sure. But does that make me a risk to be the next unethical researcher? Noooooooo.

Kushina raised her hand, oblivious to the implications of the Snake Sannin's statement. "Um, so what do we do now? Introduce ourselves?"

Orochimaru tilted his head to the side a moment in consideration, before nodding. "Yes, that sounds like a good place to start. Why don't you go first, Miss Uzumaki."

Kushina pumped her fist excitedly, before she stood up. "My name is Kushina Uzumaki! My likes are my friend Mikoto, the Uzumaki clan, Sealing, and those who go out of their way to help others!" At this, I noticed her eyes linger on me for a moment, before she continued. "I dislike the color red, people who make fun of my hair, bullies, perverts, and anyone who makes judgments about others without really knowing them. My dream is to be the first female Hokage and to bring peace to the world, ya know!" She nodded to herself as she finished, taking a seat beside me. Orochimaru lightly applauded, offering the energetic girl a slight smile, before he glanced at Tom.

Tom stood up quickly, before he began to speak. "My name is TomCat Senju! I am the current heir to the Senju clan. My likes are my adoptive brother Miharu, my uh crush, my wood style bloodline, my brother's gift to me, and cooking food. My dislikes are bullies, ignorant people, and anyone who would hurt my precious people. My dream for the future is to help bring peace to the Elemental Nation and to see my brother finally become happy."

I felt the heat rising to my face. That idiot knows I don't respond well to stuff like that. I was brought out of my thoughts as once again, Orochimaru politely clapped, before turning his gaze onto me.

I sighed, before standing to my feet with my hands in my pockets. Might as well get this over with. "My name is Miharu Uchiha. While my kneejerk reaction is to be as evasive and vague as possible, I know my brother will just rat out my interests if I do. My likes are my idiot brother, the fact I can make people do really stupid things with my eyes, my jutsu repertoire, my new friend Kushina, foxes, cats, snakes, sleeping, and any food in the Elemental Nations. My dislikes are ignorant people, bigots, bullies, and anyone who targets the people I care about. My dream for the future? I don't know. Fall in love? Sure, we'll go with that."

Kushina offered a kind smile, with a slight blush dusting her cheeks, and Tom was crying manly tears for some ungodly reason. Annoying.

Orochimaru nodded his head approvingly, before he stood up. "My name is Orochimaru of the Sannin. My likes are snakes, ninjutsu, scientific research, my sensei, and I suppose my old team. My dislikes are perverts, drunks, lazy people, and fools. My dream for the future is to become Hokage and to master all the jutsu in the world. Oh, and to make you three into splendid ninja." The Sannin spoke with mirth, before he motioned us to follow him. I coughed to get his attention, causing him to focus his gaze back onto me.

"Oh, and before I forget? Here, sensei. A present from me to you." I casually tossed him a scroll, which he caught deftly. Upon seeing his raised eyebrow, I decided to enlighten him. "Let's just say that gift will help you with your dream. Oh, it's the left one, by the way."

Upon his confused expression, he unsealed the scroll, only for his eyes to widen in shock as a glass jar with a Sharingan eye floating inside it fell into his hand.

His expression shifted from shock to gratitude, as he walked over to me, and placed a hand on top of my head.

"Don't think because of this rather nice gift that I'm going to go easy on you in your exam." He deadpanned at me, while I merely shrugged.

Kushina chose this moment to speak up. "Sensei? What do you mean exam? Aren't we already Genin?"

Orochimaru began to chuckle darkly. "Oh, no. That exam was merely to weed out the truly hopeless from the crop of students. Each Jonin sensei has the right to administer a follow up exam to determine whether the team their assigned is worthy to be Konoha Shinobi. And unfortunately for you, I happen to be mildly sadistic, so I definitely plan to test you three. Kukukukukuk." He explained before laughing. He then turned around and began walking away. "Follow me. We will be conducting your test immediately, as you are all far too interesting to wait until tomorrow."

As we fell in line behind the Snake Sannin, Tom shot me a demanding look. I just shrugged, not really feeling like explaining myself. Kushina glanced back and forth between us, before deciding she didn't care enough to pry.

I was excited. I wonder how good of a fight Orochimaru would give me?

Xxxxxxxxxxxx

To be continued...

**As much as I wanted to include the actual test in this chapter, I was already sitting at 17 pages, so I decided to save it for the next chapter. I have work this weekend, so unless I get a chance to write while I'm there, I likely won't work on it until Sunday. **

**Until Next time, **

**Raizen out.**


	5. Chapter 5

**Back again, with me continuing to neglect Karry Dark because I'm a procrastinating piece of shit. Though, I'm like, 98% sure my reading base don't actually read other my other stories beyond the ones in their fandom. Weird. Anyway, here's more shenanigans. **

**Chapter 4: I need your sword, your clothes, and your summoning contract. **

**xxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

Konoha, Training ground 4, 0900 hours...

The sky above Training Ground 4 was fairly clear, which was nice. Given the fact we were about to be fighting an S rank ninja for funsies, I'd hate to have to do so in the rain. The training ground itself was rather bare bones. There was a pond to our left, for I guess the average water element user who couldn't yoink water from air like the Second Hokage. Beyond that, the rest of the field was pretty barebones, similar to Field 7 in the anime, meaning a big ass clearing surrounded by a lot of trees. Hell, the birds were chirping rather peacefully this morning, which was an odd prelude to fighting a guy who tossed out forbidden jutsu like Oprah with her gifts.

Tom, Kushina, and I stood opposite from Orochimaru in the clearing, who was watching us with a bemused expression. His eyes darted back and forth between us, as if gauging where he thought we were at as genin. He really was not going to enjoy the next few hours. When I started chuckling to myself, Tom looked at me like I was crazy.

"Are you really that damn excited to fight him? He-" Tom pointed at the still amused Snake Sannin, "Is one of the slipperiest people in the Elemental Nations. He's also next to impossible to kill."

If Orochimaru hadn't been curious about our team, he sure as hell was now. He flicked his yellow eyes over to Tom, before voicing his question. "Oh? And how would you know how difficult I am to kill? To my knowledge, my skillset is fairly hidden even among high ranking ninja. An academy student should have no way of knowing anything about what I can do beyond the fact I have a snake contract."

"Aha! I knew I was forgetting something. How psychotic is Manda right now? And if the answer is 6 or higher out of 10, I'm gonna have to have to re-educate him." I commented casually, prompting Orochimaru to narrow his eyes.

"How do you know the name of the King of Snakes?" Any humor in the Sannin's eyes was lost, and he seemed to be a bit unnerved by the information we seemed to have. "He's dangerous, and I don't want you meddling around with him, as he could hurt you."

"I'm going to just say Woody and I helped kill Danzo and Hanzo, and we know shit. That's all."

Orochimaru started laughing, though it didn't seem to be mocking or malicious. He genuinely thought we were kidding.

"You genin have jokes. That's good-" He stopped mid sentence when he saw me flipping through hand signs.

"Wind Style: Vacuum Wave!" I called out as I unleashed the slicing blades of wind towards my sensei.

His eyes widened, before flipping through his own set of seals. "Wind Style: Great Breakthrough!" Immediately, his blast of wind met mine in a destructive clash, before dispersing.

"You really did kill the old warmonger. I was wondering why he hadn't demanded I engage in more experiments on POWs lately..." Orochimaru trailed off in thought, cogs turning in his mind rapidly. "You're not actually genin level ninja." He stated accusingly.

I shrugged, whereas Tom looked bashful. Kushina just hopped up excitedly, rushing over to the Snake sannin, stars in her eyes.

"I really am a genin though, Orochimaru-sensei!" She spluttered out in excitement, hopping like a bunny as she looked up at the tall and pale man in front of her. He just chuckled a bit, before patting her on the head.

"Well, I guess I know who will need my help the most. However, I still would like to test you three, if only as a formality. Kushina, please return to your teammates, so I can explain the test."

Orochimaru said kindly, before he placed his hands behind his back. I thought I saw something slither down his back into the grass, but I wasn't sure. When the energetic redhead of our team sat down between Tom and I, Orochimaru began to speak again. "So I was going to use the bell exercise, but it would be a moot point given how close you three seem to be. Therefore, I'm going to cut out the pretense of that test, and merely have you all attack me as a team."

Tom and I shared a glance, silently agreeing to hide certain moves we had and keep everything at about chunin level unless necessary. I activated my sharingan, Kushina tightened her headband, and Tom cracked his knuckles a bit.

"Well then, shall we begin?" Orochimaru questioned, before three snakes lept at us from the grass. I stopped the ones attacking Kushina and myself with a conductive screen of lightning chakra, while Tom simply caught his with his hand. "Interesting. You defended the least experienced peer with high level lightning manipulation. But let us see how you handle this."

The snake sannin began flipping through a familiar set of hand seals, prompting my eyes to widen. Upon watching the large build up of chakra, I knew there was only one snake he could be summoning. Indeed, Orochimaru slammed his palm into the ground, before a giant cloud of smoke erupted from the seal, before the giant form of the Snake King Manda stood in all his scaly glory.

Manda did not look very happy though, when he saw what he'd been summoned for. "You dare summon me for something as paltry as testing your genin? Maybe I should start demanding harsher penalties for summoning, boy-" Unfortunately, the giant snake had made the mistake of looking in my now Mangekyo Sharingan eyes.

"Kotoamatsukami." I whispered like a prayer, before willing the snake to be less cruel. If this didn't work, I was going to beat him to death with my Susano'o, secrets be damned.

The giant snake seemed to wobble a bit, before shaking his head. "What was I saying? Oh. Your genin. I'll be happy to test them, Orochimaru-boy." Orochimaru narrowed his eyes at me, rightfully assuming I had something to do with his boss summons drastic improvement in disposition. He chose not to confront me about it yet, instead content to watch us fight against the snake. Manda lunged at us, causing us to scatter. Tom began to leap through the forest away from me, I landed on the pond, before subtly channeling large amounts of lightning chakra through my feet into the pond, and Kushina was flipping through her own sets of hand seals.

She finished a few moments later, before calling out her technique. "Uzumaki Secret Technique: Whirlpool Graveyard!" Immediately, the ground underneath Manda began to swirl and sink, causing the Snake King to struggle for a few moments against the technique. Kushina had to cut off her jutsu after about 10 seconds, due to chakra requirements. Still, it was a good idea, but Manda was too strong for it to work with her current reserves, large though they may be.

"That was a great idea, Kushina! He's just too big for that to work. Anyone else would have been toast!" I called out to her, as I finished electrifying the pond for my own plan. I saw her give me a thumbs up without taking her eyes off of Manda. Flipping through hand seals, I began to let my chakra flare around me, causing water to rise up from the pond. "Hyrid Style: Shocking Water Dragon Jutsu!" I called out, watching the water immediately form into a dragon before it launched towards Manda. The Snake was far more agile than he looked, coiling himself out of the way of the dragon. He wasn't able to avoid it completely, though, as the back part of his tail was caught by part of the dragon's tail. He cried out as the electric chakra was conductive through his body, locking up his ability to move for a few moments. It was then I saw a mass of wooden hands surge from the treeline towards the giant snake, using the opportunity to bind Manda in place. It was then that Orochimaru made himself known again, slashing at me with the Kusanagi sword when he thought I wasn't paying attention. My sharingan picked up that he'd blunted the blade with dull wind chakra, which let me know he wasn't trying to kill me. I dodged a few times, before I pulled a tanto from my sleeve and parried his strike, though he immediately went on a taijutsu offensive, landing several vicious strikes on my abdomen. I coughed up some blood, before he kicked me away, causing me to tumble across the surface of the water. I was able to halt my spin after a few moments, before I watched him form some Mud clones on the shore to engage Kushina.

She formed a cross seal and formed some shadow clones in response, and they began to brawl it out. I cast my gaze towards Manda, who was still fighting Tom on the other side of the clearing, shattering the wood style techniques thrown his way. I shook my head a bit, before reexamining the Snake Sannin, who was watching me with interest.

"I admit. You're all extremely interesting. I can tell, however, that you and the Senju boy are holding back on me."

"Don't take it as an insult. A good magician never shows all his tricks in the first act." I said with a grin, a bit of blood still on my lips.

Orochimaru laughed a bit, before nodding. "True enough. However, I think we should kick this up a notch. You don't seem as inclined towards restraint as your brother, so let's see how far you can push me."

Immediately, an onslaught of snakes leapt at me from below the surface of the water. I dodged them, my sharingan calculating the trajectories and letting me weave between them effortlessly. I flipped backwards, going through the handseals of what had become my favorite fire technique. "Fire Style: Majestic Destroyer Flame!" I yelled, before launching the massive wave of flames towards the snake sannin. He lifted an eyebrow, before he flipped through his own seals, causing a wall of water to rise between himself and my jutsu. I took advantage of his lack of visual on me, and cut the chakra to my feet, sinking into the pool of water, before going through another set of hand seals for a genjutsu I'd always wanted to try. 'Genjutsu: Bringer of Darkness Jutsu.' I mentally stated, directing the technique towards my sensei, as he looked around for me. I then channeled a thurst of wind chakra to my feet, propelling me upwards, breaking the surface of the water a few moments later, gasping for breath as I did so.

"I admit, it's surprising you know the signature genjutsu of the Second Hokage. I wonder how he'd respond to an Uchiha using so many of his moves." The sannin commented idly, knowing I could hear him. I watched his nostril twitch, before he launched a striking shadow snake attack towards me. I was forced to dodge, as Orochimaru began his onslaught on me as if he wasn't underneath one of the most disorienting genjutsus ever made. My respect for the snake sannin shot up immensely, though my wonder was short lived as he landed a kick on my temple, sending me careening out of the pond and back onto dry land.

"While most people tend to succumb to panic when that jutsu is placed on them, most high rank shinobi are able to subvert it using smell. Still, if you use it in conjunction with other sensory deprivation genjutsu, you can essentially overcome the few weaknesses of the Bringer of Darkness." Orochimaru commented in what I took as a teaching voice. I watched as he stopped his chakra flow and his breathing for a moment, before he opened his eyes to meet mine.

"I actually don't know many genjutsu, sensei. I'd like to learn more though." I stated, since we seemed to be taking a moment's pause in our fight. I could hear Tom and Kushina still fighting behind though, as well as Manda's frustrated curses.

Orochimaru nodded his head. "I could see you excelling with it, despite your talent for elemental ninjutsu. I had actually pegged you as a genjutsu specialist, though I was apparently wrong to an extent. I see the deviousness and cunning you try to hide, Miharu."

I offer a shrug in response before replying. "Perhaps. I just know my goals, and how to best achieve them."

Orochimaru watched me intently, before he began to laugh. "Oh yes, you are so very much like me. I'd offer to take you as my sole apprentice, but for some reason, I take it you only come as a package deal with them." Amusement and interest was clear in his expression as he turned to watch Kushina trying to outdo the mud clones she was fighting.

I nodded my head in agreement. "You're correct. You either take all of us, or none."

"Well considering how delightfully intriguing you all are, how could I possibly say no? Now let's go collect your teammates. I'm going to treat you all to lunch at this delightful little dango shop..."

I raised a brow, but nonethless began to follow my new teacher as he walked towards the other two. I watched him dispel the mud clones, before he said some generic words of praise to Kushina, who pumped her fist excitedly in response. When she looked over to me for confirmation, I merely offered a small but tired smile. The mass scale lightning conduction in conjunction with an off affinity ninjutsu had drained me a bit. I made my way over to a nearby tree, and leaned against it, taking a moment to catch my breath. I watched as Orochimaru halted the slugfest between his summon and my brother, which was apparently getting a little out of hand. I watched them talk for a moment, before they boarded Manda's head, and he carried them towards us. When he slithered over, he then placed his head on the ground.

"Get on, hatchling. Orochimaru wants to make a statement when we return to the village." Upon seeing the mischievous grin on my teacher's face, I couldn't help but grin back. The people of Konoha were going to freak out.

Xxxxxxxxxx

Hokage's Office/Mission Counter, two months later...

Thanks to efforts by Tom and myself to orchestrate a Five Kage Summit, the Third Shinobi World War seemed to be postponed for the moment. While Ay, Moya, Satetsu, and Ohnoki were a little skeptical of a united shinobi alliance, they also weren't against the idea. Sarutobi had outlined it as a transition of shinobi to internal peacekeeping forces that would sometimes work on joint operations. This idea had merit, though each Kage had made their own suggestions to help make it work. The Third Kazekage, Satetsu, had suggested upping the frequency of international trade and lowering of tariffs on goods between nations, as a means of promoting economic unity among the nations. The Third Mizukage, Moya, suggested that each country exchange any outstanding POWs from the previous war as a gesture of good faith, along with small financial reparations to those individuals. Ay had suggested using the Chunin and Jonin exams as means to simulate war to keep up and coming ninja strong and adaptable. Ohnoki had suggested that each village compile a delegation of ambassadors to each village. Each would be a specialist in the chakra nature native to their home village, so they could council the ninja in their destination village who possessed alternative/uncommon chakra natures. It would also serve as a means to watchdog each other, though it was meant as a precautionary measure, as each of the Kage agreed that war was a tiresome and barbaric affair.

When the topic of the minor villages popped up, the kage agreed to each ensure a steady flow of missions and duties for those of minor villages, to avoid upsetting their livelihood. Furthermore, they established a series of incentives to encourage the smaller villages to participate in the Shinobi Alliance. This included things like aid in the event of natural disasters/Chakra monster attacks, help with handling bandits and high rank rogue ninja, as well as offering them a seat at the table when discussing alliance matters. While it would be a while before the old tensions and rivalries settled and the alliance was truly solidified, the first steps had been taken, and things were looking positive.

As for my team, we'd gained a bit of a reputation as showboats, given how Orochimaru-sensei liked to parade us around on Manda when we went on missions. We think part of it was he wanted to show up Jiraiya and the other part was he was proud of how effective we were as a team. In the two months we'd been active, we'd managed to accomplish quite a few missions both in and out of the village. The D-Ranks were relatively soul crushing, and it didn't help that there were way more than we could cheat our way through with clones helping the work. Unsurprisingly, Team 7 ended up being our rivals, given how much our teachers had to one up each other. It was a little reminiscent of Guy and Kakashi, only somehow even more over the top. The most recent challenge had been a drinking contest between Manda and Gamabunta, with both ending up losing to Tsunade, who'd inexplicably become involved at some point.

Currently, my team, along with the others from our year in the academy, were standing before the Hokage, who was contentedly puffing away at his pipe. He seemed to be getting a kick out of watching the genin squirm a bit in his presence. After a few more moments of schadenfreude, he stood and addressed us. "My newly minted genin. Your generation is one of the most talented our village has produced. It is for this reason, that I am sending you all to the newly restructured Chunin Exam, which will take place in the Land of the Moon. They have agreed to host exams as a neutral ground in exchange for protection by the alliance as they do not have their own shinobi forces. As such, the Mizukage and the Tsuchikage have agreed to function as proctors for the exams, which will take place over the next two months. You will leave tomorrow, and are expected to remain for the duration of the exams, regardless of how far your team makes it."

At this declaration, I heard some of the other genin begin to whisper excitedly amongst themselves. I began to rack my brain on the possibilities of who we might see at these exams. While Ay was only 17, he was already the kage, so he was out. Bee was a possibility, since he was still young enough to be in it. Who his teammates would be was up in the air, as I wasn't sure how old Darui or Shi were at this point in time, though they were the most likely suspects. From Stone, Kitsuchi was a given since he was the Tsuchikage's son, along with Roshi and Han. As for Mist, any of Kisame's generation of Seven Swordsmen were likely, along with Yagura Utakata. From Sand, Sasori was a given, as were Rasa of the Gold Release and Yashamaru. All in all, a lot of big names from what would have been the Third Shinobi War.

I glanced over to Tom, who seemed to be drawing the same conclusions I was. If we weren't already S rank shinobi, this might actually be a difficult challenge. Kushina, however, would find the individual matches difficult. She was a highly skilled Genin, no doubt, but she wasn't near the S rank shinobi she would become in the original series. Still, Orochimaru probably had a plan for that, given how meticulous the man was in everything he did. He'd already let me formally sign the Snake contract for my efforts at mellowing out Manda, taught all three of us to summon the Rashomon Gates for defense, and worked on upping Kushina's arsenal of water style ninjutsu and chakra control. I had worked with her on building up rapport with Kurama, who was open to the idea of being used as a summon animal, since it meant he got to stretch his legs a bit. Kushina had been pretty vocal about how she had the coolest summoning beast out of all of us. To be fair, it wasn't really a fair comparison to put a nine tailed fox against a bunch of snakes and slugs. Though, the biggest surprise was Tom handing me the summoning contract to the Salamanders. He'd apparently stolen off of Hanzo's corpse, figuring I'd want it at some point. While I couldn't use it myself given I was now slated to be the next Snake Sage after Orochimaru, I'd decided I'd give it to Kushina since she'd have an actual summoning clan besides her tailed beast.

Orochimaru apparently noticed my introspection, and subtly flicked my ear to get my attention, before pointing to the Hokage.

Sarutobi cast his gaze onto all of us, before he smiled proudly. "I know you will all do excellently in this exam. I do not know the full details of what you will be tasked with, only that the first is a survival exercise, and the second is a tournament. The specifics, however, will be disclosed when you actually take the exams. The genin are dismissed, though I need the Jonin to remain behind to go over the travel details."

Upon hearing that, Kushina, Tom, and I made our way out of the office and through the tower. I glanced at my teammates as we made our way towards the exit. Kushina was practically shaking with excitement, and Tom wasn't much better. Apparently, my dull expression was noticeable to Kushina, who suddenly gripped my shoulders and began to shake me.

"Oh my god, Miharu. WHY ARE YOU SO INDIFFERENT?! This is so cool, ya know! We get to go to the Land of Moon, and we get to fight against strong people! How are you not bouncing with joy?!" She demanded manically, shaking me so ragdollishly hard that I was beginning to get dizzy.

"Uh, I dunno. Mostly because I've got pretty strong guesses on who will be taking the exams?" I replied, trying to maintain my blank expression for no other purpose in this moment, for no other reason than to annoy Kushina. It was working, if the fact her hair was beginning to rise up into Habanero mode.

"Miharu, you idiot!" She punched me in the top of my head, sending me careening to the floor. "This is a big deal for me, ya know! I've always wanted to go to the Land of the Moon! Be a little more excited for me, ya know!" She must be really excited, if her verbal tic is kicking in so much.

"Fine, fine. I'm excited." I said as unenthusiastically as I could manage. I saw her eye twitch, and she raised those bricks she called hands again, prompting me to wave my hands in front of me frantically. "Okay, okay! I'm really excited you get to live one of your dreams. I'll stop messing with you. I was practicing my resting Uchiha face."

Upon hearing my statement, Tom groaned, dragging a hand down his face in annoyance. Kushina just tilted her head to the side, but didn't say anything else. Once we made it outside, we glanced around at the other genin teams who'd be going. Shibi stood silent next to Minato, who was talking excitedly to Mikoto, a slight blush on her cheeks at his enthusiasm and the way he kept touching her shoulders when he spoke to her. Chouza and Inoichi seemed happy, while Shikaku was draped lazily over Chouza's Shoulders as they walked off towards the BBQ place. The Hyuga twins were conversing with Tsume, who was holding her dog Kuromaru on her shoulder. Kushina watched all her friends fondly, before she clapped both us on the shoulder.

"Come on, guys. Let's go celebrate." Kushina said in front of us, her arms held behind her back in a coquettishly cute manner.

I watched her a moment, before I reached into my kunai pouch, and pulled out the Salamander summoning scroll, before tossing it to her. "There. That's yours now. Use it wisely, and practice using it while we are traveling tomorrow. It'll give you an edge in the exams." I said dryly, before I walked past her, not deigning to say anything else. I heard her gasp behind me, which I assume was from her realizing what I'd given her, but I kept walking with my hands in my pocket. Or I would have, if I wasn't immediately tackled by a red blur. I stumbled, before smacking into the ground, wincing as I did so. When I opened my eyes, I was staring into Kushina's purple orbs.

"Thank you for the present, Miharu. I promise I'll use it well." She spoke gratefully, deciding to nuzzle my cheek with hers for some ungodly reason. I blushed furiously at the contact, before I shot back from underneath her, until I hit a wall. I then pointed at her accusingly.

"Why did you do that?! That was waaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too much! And waaaay too cute! Don't do that!" I said in a rather flustered fashion, still trying to calm my rapid heartbeat.

Tom was standing a few feet away, amusement clear on his face. The bastard was enjoying this far more than he should. Kushina for her part, looked somewhere between pleased and amused at my reaction.

"It seems Miharu isn't so used to female contact,huh Tom?"

"It seems not, Kushina. How sad."

"Aw, it's okay, Miharu. I think it's very cute."

"I know no less than 800 different ways to torture you in Tsukuyomi for three days. But sure, keep annoying the guy with insta-torture eyes." I said through gritted teeth, activating my Mangekyo for added effect.

Tom and Kushina shared a laugh at my expense, which then prompted me to teleport away using the Flying Thunder God. I didn't feel like dealing with the two of them at the moment, so warping to the roof of the hospital was a safe bet. Tom warped behind me, but I immediately used my Sharingan to knock him out, causing him to faceplant. I made a shadow clone to deliver him back to Kushina, leaving me to my own devices.

I walked over to the railing of the roof, before I flipped through the hand seals for the summoning jutsu. After placing my hand on the ground, I was greeted by a snake the size of a couch, which happened to be my personal summon from the snake clan.

"Greetings, young Miharu." The snake said warmly, though his 's' tended to be hissed out a little bit. He glanced around the roof, before looking back to me expectantly. He was clearly wondering why he'd been summoned in such a random location.

"Hello, Kotaro. I just wanted to let you know that my team will be taking the Chunin Exams in the Land of Moon pretty soon. I'll be counting on your help to keep us safe during the exams." I said, gently patting the snake on the head. Kotaro closed his eyes and hummed in contentment.

"Very well, young master. Rest assured, with Kotaro of the Snake clan at your side, you have little to fear." The snake said in a regal tone, puffing it's chest out a bit.

I was about to reply, when I felt the presence of my sensei appear behind me. I slightly turned to see Orochimaru join me in leaning out against the railing, a mildly amused expression on his face.

"I see you ditched your teammates to come brood alone on a rooftop. How very cliché of you, my apprentice." He spoke casually, though his unspoken question was fairly obvious.

"I just didn't feel like dealing with their antics today. That's all, sensei." I stated simply before I decided to change gears. "How's the Sharingan?" I asked casually, though I was extremely curious how he was managing it.

His expression turned into a mix of delighted and annoyed, his hair parting to reveal the Sharigan in his left eye. "It's excellent but it's draining. Though, I've taken to leaving it uncovered to help up my chakra reserves, at least until I can modify my body into something more conducive to using it."

"Would a sample of my blood help?" I asked/offered. I didn't really care that much, though my clan might have a fit if they found out.

"It would, if only to use as base until I can splice my DNA a bit." He admitted reluctantly. I was noticing more and more how this Orochimaru was very strict on his research ethics, which lead me to wonder if it was losing the title of Hokage was what drove him off the deep end.

"Here them. I figured it might be a little draining, so I prepared accordingly." I reached into my pouch and pulled a vial of blood, before handing it to my teacher.

"I appreciate it greatly. While my reserves are large enough I can use it well without much trouble against typical ninja, I could see the drain hindering me in prolonged combat."

"It's not a big deal to me, sensei. It helps you with your dream, so that's what matters."

"Still, I'd like to repay you somehow."

"You already gave me the snake contract and essentially made me your apprentice. I'd say we're pretty even."

Orochimaru chuckled, but shook his head. "How about I teach you my two of signature techniques?"

I raised an eyebrow slightly, curious at the offer. "If you want. What are they?"

"I figured you'd be interested. You seem to crave new techniques in much the same manner I do. The first is the one you already know: the striking shadow snakes. It is an common transformation technique, that morphs the users arm into a mass of writhing venomous snakes for a moment. It's a highly useful move. The second is the Five Elements Seal. While it's useful against most ninja, it's particularly good at disrupting the chakra control of Jinchuriki."

By this point, my eyesbrows were shot into my hairline. That was one more I'd forgotten that Orochimaru used. Effective against Jinchuriki indeed.

"Thanks, sensei. Those will be especially useful during the chunin exams." I said with a small smile, gratitude evident in my tone.

"Think nothing of it, my young apprentice. Just make sure you win. Otherwise, it looks bad on me."

I felt a bead of sweat form on my forehead at his declaration, but nodded nonetheless. He went about explaining the mechanics of both and how to form each technique, my attention rapt as he went through the ins and outs of each move. When he finished, the sun was beginning to set in the sky.

"It's getting late, and I plan for us to be the first team to leave tomorrow. So be at the gate ready to leave by 6 AM."

"Got it, sensei. Take care."

As we headed our separate ways, I felt a wave of apprehension. So many Jinchuriki would likely be in this exam. I could confidently handle one on my own, but handling six would be a stretch. I shook my head. That type of scenario where I fought all six at once was highly unlikely, especially since many of them were from different villages. As I made my way back to my apartment, I smiled inspite of myself. Regardless of how it turned out, things were certainly about to get interesting.

Xxxxxxxxx

To Be continued...


	6. Chapter 6

**Back again. Don't know why. I'm debating starting a Ko-Fi or a , if only as a means to make my hobby a little more justifiable time wise. Don't worry. I wouldn't lock my shit behind a paywall. I'm not EA or Bethesda. LOL. I know Yojimbra does it, but I don't really know how I feel about it. At any rate, dm me your thoughts if you care enough, or have suggestions for how to make it work. **

**Anyway, here's another chapter. If my writing seems more angry than usual, it's because my day was not great. **

**Chapter 6: Arrival in the Land of Moon**

It was strange how uneventful the first leg of the trip to the Land of Moon had been. Though, maybe I was just expecting the trip to play out like it had in the movie, with a bandit attack or three on various legs of the trip. No such luck, and soon our team arrived at the port city of Kikai, where we'd be taking a ferry to the Land of Moon proper. The city itself was bustling, with various stalls lining the streets and people going to and fro about their business. No one batted an eye at the presence of Konoha Ninja, who were just like any other tourists to the residents of Kikai.

The four of us walked in a loose formation, with Tom and Kushina chatting amicably to my left, whereas Orochimaru was proofreading Jiraiya's first draft of the 'Tale of the Gutsy Ninja'. Tom and Kushina were talking about the specifics of summoning animals effectively in different situations. I was keeping my distance, still annoyed at them for making fun of me the other day, content to brood silently. I'd always had a tendency to sequester myself and process alone, so I saw no reason to break the trend. So I just continued walking silently with my hands in my pocket and my Sharingan spinning wildly as I took in the scenery.

We continued walking towards the pier casually, until I sensed someone running towards us, followed by Kushina crying out slightly, and landing on the ground. Immediately, I launched myself towards what I assumed to be a thief, gripping them by their throat in front of me. What I hadn't expected, was to come face to face with Ameyuri Ringo of the Seven Swordsman of the Mist, who appeared to be struggling to breath.

"I'd return what you stole from my teammate before I decide to crush your windpipe. You may be a fellow examinee, but I wonder how your Mizukage would react to such a blatant disregard for the new attempts at peace." I then reached with my free hand into her kunai pouch, and removed the Salamander scroll she'd pilfered from my teammate. I then dropped Ringo unceremoniously before I turned around and walked back to my team. I heard her growl and attempt to draw her blade, before I turned my head partway back, glaring at her with my Mangekyo. She recoiled as if I'd struck her. "You don't get to act as the wounded party here. You attempted to rob my teammate. Whatever grudge against the Uzumaki you may have, come near her again and I'll kill you slowly."

Having said my piece, and having zero interest in listening to some sob story attempted to justify harming an innocent, I walked back towards my team. I only made it a few steps before a hulking figure stepped in front me. The current wielder of Samehada, Fuguki Suikazan, stood glaring down at me. I raised an eyebrow in curiosity, waiting for his inevitable spiel.

"You put your hands on my student again, I'll slice you to ribbons with Samehada." He said, before bumping his shoulder against mine.

I got agitated, before focusing all my killing intent on him, causing him to freeze in his tracks. "If your klepto student tries to rob my friend again, I'll cut off her hands and choke her to death with them. We clear have an understanding, sharkbait?" It might have been confrontational, but I didn't care. I was in a bad mood already, and the fact these Mist ninja instigated shit then tried to cop attitude pissed me off.

"Crystal. Come along, Ameyuri." Fuguki said, before he pulled his student to her feet, and walked off. I was sorely tempted to lock them in a genjutsu loop when Kushina hit me over the head.

I turned angrily, glaring at her. "What the hell was that for?"

"You're being too edgy and hostile. Stop it. We're supposed to be building relationships with the next generation of foreign shinobi. If you threaten to maim them all, they'll just end up hating the Hidden Leaf, and all the work you did would be for nothing." She said angrily, before poking me in the ribs. I swatted her hand away, before shoving the summoning scroll into her arms, and walked off. I wouldn't bother explaining my actions, because I didn't see the point. "Miharu, wait, I-"

I didn't hear her finish because I used the teleportation jutsu to remove myself from the situation. I landed on the boat assigned to the Konoha teams, before I saw down, and summoned Kotaro. I had him wrap himself around me to drive home the point to my fellow genin that I didn't want to be bothered. I closed my eyes in the darkness, placing a hand on my summons belly and rubbing him gently, before nodding off to sleep. I could feel the rumble of vibrations on Kotaro's body, indicating he was talking to someone, but I couldn't make out what he was saying. I shrugged, before I let the gentle lull and rocking of the boat put me to sleep.

Xxxxxxxxx

Land of the Moon, Three days later, 0800 hours.

The trip to the island had been tense and fairly awkward. I'd yet to clear the air with Kushina or my brother, but considering they'd failed to make any efforts on their side, I didn't feel too upset by the temporary fissure in our group. Orochimaru had spent most of the first two days helping Kushina cultivate a sense for strategically using the salamander summons. Tom looked at me several times during the boat ride, but had taken to conversing with Minato and Shibi instead, choosing to give me space. I scoffed a bit, but I wasn't going to apologize when I did nothing wrong. I refocused my attention out to the approaching island, placing my head on my arms against the railing. I saw someone walk up beside me, but I didn't bother to see who it was.

"You know, Kushina was pretty upset the other day when you ditched the celebration she wanted to have over our acceptance into the chunin exams." Came the ever self-righteous tone of Mikoto, who took up a place beside me against the railing. "She kept hoping you'd join the rest of us, and though she acted like she didn't care, we could all tell she was really upset that you never came back."

I scoffed, but didn't say anything else, my own belief that my actions were justified keeping me quiet.

"You really don't have anything to say, Miharu? Really?" Mikoto asked incredulously, unable or refusing to mind her own business.

"I detest being toyed with by anyone. I'm not going to do shit until they apologized." I stated with annoyance, desperately just wanting to be alone. "Come to think of it, until she thanks me for halting the theft of her summoning scroll, I don't think I'll even breath in her general direction." I said with a rather chilly smile, hoping that if I was a jerk enough, she'd take the hint and fuck off.

"You're nothing like they say you are. All Kushina and Tom talk about is how smart and kind you are. But me? I don't see it." She commented with a biting tone, prompting me to whirl to face her, Mangekyo blazing in my sockets.

"Do not presume to talk down to me, Mikoto! You have neither the skill nor the rank to do so-" I was cut off by a sucker punch to the face, which sent me careening to the floor. I sat there, incredulous, before the seething fires of rage built up with in me, my dark grey chakra radiating off me in waves. I look to see the disappointed stare of my brother, but before I could lash out, I felt someone wrap their arms around me from behind, hugging me tightly.

My rage halted in its tracks.

"I'm sorry, Miharu. I shouldn't have teased you like that, given how you feel. And I'm sorry I assumed you were looking for trouble with that Mist girl. I didn't even realize she'd taken my salamander scroll until you gave it back to me. Thank you, even if I think you went overboard." I felt her place her head in the gap between my shoulder blades. I froze, unsure of how to handle all this.

"I'm sorry I flew off the handle. I was a jerk the past 5 days." I grasped one of her hands that was on my chest, covering it with my own. "The idea that some upstart would try to hurt my friend for some foolish grudge made me lose it."

"Why did you lose your cool like that, ya know?" Kushina asked curiously, her voice muffled due to her position. I could feel the onlookers watching us curiously, which was embarassing.

"Because when she rammed into you, she mouthed 'filthy Uzumaki', meaning she likely lost someone to your clansmen when the Whirlpool village fell a few years ago in the last war. I wasn't about to let some foolish person that's stuck in the past hurt you." I mumbled quietly, though I heard her hum in response, so I knew she heard me.

I took a moment to glare at the other genin who looked a little too interested, my Sharingan scaring off most of them, though Tom, Mikoto, and Minato were still hanging around. Minato was comforting Mikoto, who'd apparently been startled by either my relatively dark chakra or the sudden shift in my Sharingan.

"Miharu?" Kushina's muffled voice once again got my attention.

"What is it?"

"Next time, just let me finish my sentences before you teleport away. It's not fair, ya know?"

I sighed, knowing she had a point. Crush or no crush, she was my friend, and I owed her that much at least.

"Fine, I promise, Kushina. I won't be so antisocial." For some reason, I felt like I'd just promised something impossible. Tom apparently found that hilarious, because he began laughing, drawing my attention to him. "And then we have you. If you think I'm not plotting 30 different ways to make you pay for the sucker punch, you are sadly mistaken."

"It got you to stop being a broody fuckhead didn't it? Besides, you were acting like SU. You hate SU." Tom commented casually, though his words caused me to freeze in abject horror. I fucking hated Sasuke Uchiha. The mere idea I was even remotely emulating that prick sent shivers up my spine.

"Okay, point taken. Still." I pointed my finger at Tom, who then began to scream and run around like he was being attack by birds.

"Mou~, you're really not nice with genjutsu, Miharu, ya know."

"No. No, I am not."

xxxxxxxxxxxxx

One hour later, Land of Moon Island, Main Street...

Once the boat had docked, the various Konoha teams had split up to do their own thing. I'd gotten a moment to apologize to Mikoto briefly before Team Seven left, to which she hugged me and told me all was forgiven. So that was one less thing on my conscience. As for my team, the four of us were taking in the sights of the city's main street, which was about as close to paradise as I could call a tropical location. Considering I hate tropical weather, that was saying something. The city looked like a mixture of a coastal city you'd see in Italy with a bit of Asian and Hawaiian influence on the building designs. Fruit stands littered the streets, and Casinos and other forms of nightlife were all around us. In the distance, we could see the giant spiral castle of the island's ruler, as well as the coastline/beaches past the streets on our right. People were freely walking around with cocktails and wearing beachwear, laughing without a care in the world.

I glanced at my team for their reactions. Tom seemed to be enjoying the culture and atmosphere, like a typical extrovert. Orochimaru was sipping on the giant mojito looking drink he'd purchased from a vendor stall with a mud clone, which looked really refreshing. Beyond that, he was still reading Jiraiya's book, weaving through the crowd, reminding me of Kakashi for a moment. Kushina, however, was awestruck. Her eyes were dancing with wonder and delight as she took in everything around her. I'd picked up she had slightly stronger than average senses, which I assumed was a byproduct of the fox, so she was likely in sensory stimulation heaven. She seemed to love busy places, because they reminded her of Whirlpool, which I can only assume was strengthened by the fact this was a port city much like her home village had been. She was...breathtaking, her happiness radiating off of her in waves. I had to look away, a blush creeping up my cheeks. I heard Orochimaru chuckle, so I knew he'd seen everything. I glanced over at him, but he just put a finger to his lips in a conspiratory manner, before resuming his reading.

"Sensei?" Tom asked suddenly, sounding slightly hesitant. I glanced at my brother, who was glancing around as if he was waiting for something.

"Yes, little Senju?" Came Orochimaru's silky smooth reply, a bemused expression on his face as he continued to seemingly dodge other pedestrians without looking.

"Are we staying at one of the hotel's while we are here?"

"Yes and no. During the Survival exercise, you will most likely be camping in the island's forests and beaches. Hence why I had you purchase camping gear before we left. During the other parts of the trip, we have a room reserved at one of the hotels up ahead. The Kage organized a promotional deal with local government, and all the ninja participating were given discounted rates for the months we will be here."

Tom sighed in relief. I guess he'd thought we'd be sleeping in the woods for the whole month. That would be pretty annoying, as the lack of a shower would have been a pain. I was about to chime in with a sarcastic remark, I felt someone grab my hand, causing me to jump about a foot in the air. I looked to my hand, then followed the connecting arm. Yep. It was Kushina's. Fucking. Shit. Okay, don't freak out, don't freak out, don't freak out, I'M FREAKING OUT!

"MIHARU! Let's get some ice cream!" She sent a pleading look to our sensei, who merely had his mud clone nod and pat her on the head. That was all the energetic redhead needed to hear, before she pulled me towards an ice cream shop, while my brother and our sensei waited patiently outside. I sighed, but was secretly pleased at some time with Kushina. She was such a freaking ball of sunshine I couldn't help but feel cheerful around her. I was not, however, feeling the icecream. So I casually made four shadow clones, and instructed them to scour the city for beef kebabs. I was skeptical they'd have them, but I figured I'd make the effort anyway.

I glanced back over at Kushina, who had stars in her eyes as she looked at the seemingly endless menu. She then shot over to the now startled shop worker, who was baffled by the redhead with seemingly unending energy. She bounced around the counter looking at the multitude of flavors, before she looked back at me excitedly.

"Miharu! Look at how many flavors they have! Isn't this the coolest shop ever?" She said, lightly clapping her hands together in front of her. I couldn't help but smile softly at her innocent joy, given how infectious it was. Though, at her choice of words, I had to use my chance to be slightly witty.

"Well, considering it's an ice cream shop, it has to be at least 0 degrees Celsius cool." I commented with amusement, before I poked her arm a little. "Go on. Make you order. Buy as much as you want. My treat." As soon as I said those words, I felt an ominous feeling descend upon me, as if I'd just thrown my wallet into a black hole. I looked at Kushina, whose eyes had been shadowed over by her bangs, before they shot up, fire burning in her amethyst orbs.

"Hey, Mr. Ice Cream Shop Guy! I will have a 12 scoop bowl of your twelve most popular flavors, ya know!" I admit, I might have changed my mind if she wasn't smiling so damn hard her eyes resembled upside down Us, and had the most radiant damn smile I'd ever seen on someone's face.

"Uh, sure, miss. Right away." He was baffled, but complied, dutifully scooping the ice cream in a bowl, stacking it high as necessary. I sighed, but walked over to the cashier, and waited to find out much Kushina had just assassinated my wallet by. I was very surprised when the total was only 1400 ryo, but I shrugged and paid the guy without much complaint. Given I expected it to be 10k ryo, I felt like I'd dodged a bullet. Kushina was waiting for me over by the exit, happily chowing down on her frozen treat. I made my way to her, and we exited the store, before regrouping with our team, once again back on the road. About five minutes later, we arrived at the hotel, which was littered with visiting shinobi. Much like I'd anticipated, upon entering, I saw the familiar faces of Killer Bee, Rasa, and Kisame Hoshigaki, to name a few. In fact, pretty much everyone I'd predicted was lounging around the hotel lobby, chatting amicably with each other. However, there were equal as many people I didn't recognize, though they were most likely fodder genin sent for mere participation alone. The Hotel itself was fairly high end, though not to the point of being gaudy. It was nicely decorated with tropical themed décor, meaning it was probably a tourist trap. After further scanning the lobby, I spotted Fuguki and Ameyuri, who seemed to be arguing in the corner of the lobby about something. Not that I cared much, really. I was about to do something mean, but I heard Sensei clear his throat to get our attention, so I turned back to face him instead. He smiled, before he placed his book away.

"My little pupils, tomorrow will be the first day of the exams. After I get our room keys and we get settled, I will our orders for our meals for the day, as well as give you the details of tomorrow's survival exercise. While I cannot force you to go to bed at a reasonable hour..." He paused to look at me for a moment, prompting me to flush a bit with embarrassment. "I would suggest you do so. The crop of contestants this year is very strong, with multiple prodigies and jinchuriki participating this time around. You must be on your guard, and do not ever under estimate your opponents." He finished with a tone of warning, to which we nodded.

He then went to the reception desk, and after a few moments, returned with our keys. We then made our way up the elevator to the third floor, where we opened entered our room. It was pretty large for four people, resembling an apartment a hotel room, but I wasn't about to complain. Additionally, the room had customizable partitions, so Kushina was able to set up her own private changing area, something I appreciated as I did not feel like ending up in some anime misunderstanding hijinks scenario. Other than that, the room was very reminiscent of the ones you see in anime episodes that involve hot spring inns. It was about thirty minutes later when we all finished unpacking. We'd all changed into lounge wear yukata(something I was not used to at all), and we waited as Orochimaru finished ordering our food, which was delivered relatively quickly.

I had ordered(read: demanded) 10 skewers of beef kebabs and 2 bowls of miso soup and rice, Kushina had ordered Sushi and Ramen, Tom ordered 3 thick cut steaks and a mound of steamed vegetables, and Orochimaru ordered 12 skewers of Dango along with an little bit of everything we'd chosen, as well as a bottle of sake. When I asked about how pricey it was, we were told the Uchiha and Senju clans had gotten some all expenses paid type deal, so not to worry about anything.

Once we'd finished eating, we all looked towards Orochimaru expectantly, ready to hear the details of the exam.

"So as you know, the first part of the exam is a survival exercise spanning the forests and beaches across the island. Scattered throughout the designated testing area are seal flags. You need 15 to advance to the next stage. There are limited quantities of these flags, so do not waste time in collecting them. While I would normally suggest getting as many as possible, to weed out the competition, we were specifically asked that no team takes more than 15. They want the last stage of the exams to be a month long tournament, which means they need as many skilled genin as possible to advance for that. While killing is frowned upon, accidents do happen. There will be multiple ANBU proctors in the forest to intervene and police things if they feel the fights are about to turn deadly, but they are finite in number, so remain cautious. After you get 10 seals, you are to head towards the center of the exam area, which has a safe zone you will remain at until the week is up if you arrive early. I suggest you get there as soon as possible, to avoid unnecessary fatigue and problems. Any questions?"

Tom actually raised his hand first. "So sensei, what happens if a team tries to hoard more than fifteen flags?"

"Good question. After you hit the fifteen flag mark, you have 24 hours to ditch or remove additional flags from your person. And before you ask Miharu, no you can't be held responsible for flags put on your person without your knowledge."

I cursed under my breath. There went one plan of action for weeding out the chaff. Sensei waited a moment for us to voice other questions, before he bid us good night, taking a spot by the entrance and raising his partition, which he reinforced with privacy seals. The three of us sat in comfortable silence for a few moments, before Tom stood up and stretched.

"I think I'm going to head to bed as well. Night Kushina, night brother." He said softly, before he pulled out his futon and curled up, passing out relatively quickly. It was then that I noticed the bottle of unfinished Sake, which was a tragedy. So I poured myself a saucer and began sipping on it. I hummed appreciatively, before I glanced at Kushina, who looked scandalized.

"You shouldn't be drinking that! It belongs to sensei, ya know!" She whispered harshly, trying to take the bottle from me. Which I kept out of her reach with minimal effort.

"Sensei was done with it, or else he wouldn't have left it here. Sake doesn't exactly keep if it's left at room temperature, so I'm polishing it off. Unless you secretly want some?" I half asked, half accused. She blushed a bit, and went quiet. I raised my eyebrows a bit. "So you did want some, then? Okay. Here." I poured her a miniscule amount in my saucer, and handed it to her.

She looked at it a moment, before raising a brow questioningly. "Why'd you give me so little?"

"Because you're probably going to be a lightweight, and I don't want you to get sick tomorrow." I explained casually. There was also the fact I didn't want her getting drunk and doing anything weird. She alternated between looking at me and the saucer for a few seconds, before she drank it. She made a face of distaste, her face scrunching together rather cutely, before her bangs began to shadow her eyes a bit and her hair rising a bit into Habanero mode.

Uh oh. This was really bad! I've seen enough anime to know the signs when shit was about to go south fast. Despite the absurdity, she apparently had a comparably low tolerance to Rock Lee. I was about to knock her out with genjutsu when she began to giggle suddenly. Her soft peels of amused giggles halted all thoughts of escape, reminding me of a happy smol reaper about to beat me to death with my own shoes. She raised her head, a slightly loopy expression on her face, and a goofy grin plastered on her face.

"Miharuuuu~" I blinked and suddenly she was in my face. I began to sweat at her expression, which was equal parts fear inducing and adorable.

"Um... Yes, Kushina?" I began to rack my brain for solutions. I was about to try to wake sense when I felt heard clinking happening from behind Kushina. Before I could even think about moving to see what they were, I was bound tightly in Uzumaki Chakra chains. Crap. I'd forgotten she had though.

"Why don't you like me anymoreeeeee?" She then leaned uncomfortably close to my face, her slightly unfocused eyes locking onto mine.

This was really freaking bad, though at least she wasn't engaging in rampant property damage like Lee was! Yeah! I might just make it out of this alive-

"Do you hate me now?" Her question was as loaded as a Russian roulette revolver with 6 in the chamber instead of one. "Because I made fun of you, I mean."

Okay. That was unexpected. "No, I don't hate you for that, Benihime." I don't know why I called her that. "I just don't react well in social situations that overwhelm me."

"With cute girls you mean."

"Yes, with cute girl-" Oh, goddamnit. I began to sweat at my slip up. She then pointed an accusing finger in my face.

"SO YOU ADMIT I AM CUTE!" She then began to do a little...dance of some kind, before resuming her interrogation. Seriously, fuck these chains. I was bound up tighter than nun's underpants, and I was not enjoying it one bit. Apparently she didn't like my silence at all. "Wellll? What do you have to say for youself, Mistrer?" She slurred a bit, prompting me to wonder how her tolerance was that awful. I'm never letting her near alcohol again. I'd have to destroy the liquor, and maybe attempt to destroy The Liquor too(AN: Jim Lahey for the win).

"Uh, sorry?" That had apparently been the wrong answer, as the chains tightened, and she lifted me up in the air, before she began shaking me frantically like a ragdoll.

"Nooooo, don't be sorry! I like that you think I'm cute and awesome, ya know! Even if you're a broody Uchiha from another dimension, you still have pretty eyes and you're nice to me and my other friends." She tried to explain, but the fact she was shaking me like a pinata was somewhat distacting.

"Kushina-" She stopped shaking me, but her displeased look told me I'd done something wrong. I was left dangling upside down in her chain cocoon for a few moments before I realized what she wanted. "Benihime?"

She then nodded approvingly, before motioning for me to continue.

"Can you please stop shaking me, or better yet, let me go?" I pleaded, desperate to remove myself from this bizarre scenario, and start my crusade against Big Alcohol.

"Nopeeee." She said, popping the 'p'. "If I let you out of my sealing chains, you're just gonna do the whooshy teleport thingy and leave me alone with Snake Charmer-sensei and Morning Wood."

I had to blink at her drunken nicknames for my brother and our sensei. I had not expected that at all.

"Besides, you have a crush on me, and I think you're funny in an awkward way. Kinda like a hedgehog." She continued to slur a bit, before she began poking me in the cheek while I just dangled in the air helplessly. Before her words hit me. They have hedgehogs here?

"Mou~, Miharuuuuu~." I did not like that tone at all. Not one itty bitty bit. She pulled me closer, before she pulled out a hair band, and started messing with it. She then put it on my ankle. I was about to ask what the hell she was doing, but she suddenly let me go. Yes! Sweet freedom! Time to teleport away!

I closed my eyes to jump to a marker, but nothing happened. When I tried to move, that didn't work either. When I opened my eyes, I was directly looking into Kushina's amethyst pools, a smug expression on her face.

"I put suppression and paralysis seals on you so you couldn't leave and I could do this." She then tackled me, before latching onto me like a sloth. I felt like my heart was about to explode, and I wanted to die in no less that 936 different ways, if only to get out of this situation. Kushina, on the other hand, closed her eyes and put her head on my chest.

"You're a good person. You could have taken advantage of me and my lightweightness, or the fact you knew all my weak points. That's why I kinda like you, Miharu. Now, shut up and go to sleep."

I bristled indignantly at that. "How in the holy hell do you expect me to go sleep like this?" I demanded in an annoyed tone, trying to will myself to move again somehow.

She cracked open one eye, and looked at me like an idiot. "You literally have your 'anime crush' nestled on your chest, and you want to escape?"

"I don't do well with positive interaction."

"You're dumb." She said tiredly, before she closed her eyes again, and nuzzled my chest again, prompting me to turn nuclear red. She shot up suddenly though. "Wait I got it! I know how you can sleep!"

Before I could ask what the hell that meant, I had a piece of paper on my forehead, and everything went black.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

The next day, outskirts of Crescent Moon Kingdom Capitol, Hotel, 0900 hours...

The following morning had been extremely awkward, though the smug expressions on Tom and Orochimaru's faces had been almost unbearable. Tom was an easy solution, as five layered genjutsu later and he was rocking back and forth on the ground begging me to never put him back in Disney World or that horrible children's ride ever again. Orochimaru just patted me on the head, before jumping out the window go to do 'ninja things'. His words, not mine.

Kushina, on the other hand, had called me an idiot, and punched me for, and I quote, 'making her say such embarrassing things'. She did, however, demand I refer to her as Benihime more often, before she went to take a bath and get dressed. Joy, just what I needed. Her throwing me curveballs while I tried to stay away. Some deity somewhere was laughing at my misfortune, I could tell. After I could use my chakra and move again, I made two shadow clones, and had them destroy every bottle of alcohol in the hotel. Let it be known I learn from my mistakes! After Kushina returned, I took my turn in the bathroom, making quick use of the shower, before I put on a mesh undershirt, a sleeveless black hoody with a fur lining, and some gray shinobi shorts, with my headband dangling around my neck as usual.

I returned to our room to find Tom using his Sharingan eye to learn some basic seals from Kushina, while Orochimaru watched from his perch on the window. When they noticed me, they stopped the lesson, and grabbed their shinobi packs, and went to the window.

"So you guys have everything you need yes? Because the exam will start once I activate the seal on this piece of paper, which will reverse summon you to your designated starting point. Remember the rules, and I doubt you'll have much issue with the exam." Orochimaru explained kindly, before patting each of us on the head. He handed Tom the scroll, who then held it over where we both could touch it. When Sensei nodded, Tom pushed some chakra into it, and I felt the world go upside down for a minute, before we were suddenly in the middle of a forest, animals chirping happily in the background. I glanced around the surrounding, before something in the sky caught my attention. In the distance, a giant firework exploded with the word 'Begin!' come from the middle of the forest, prompting me to sigh. If I ended up having to fight multiple Jinchuriki in this stage, I was going to be pissed. And with that final thought, the first part of the Chunin Exam was officially underway.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

To be continued...

**I have mixed feelings about this chapter. Don't worry though. The next one is going to be pretty action heavy, with lots of snarky dialogue. **


	7. Chapter 7

**I admit. I started writing this about 40 minutes after posting chapter 6. I don't know why. **

**I'm considering doing a time skip after I wrap up this arc, which will be in two or three chapters. It could be between 4 to 6 years. I've got a couple ideas for the arc after that. I'm also trying to update as many of my fics as I can before both Death Stranding and Pokemon come out, and before I have to buckle down and study hard for the CPCE for my master's degree. Either way, hope you enjoy the chapter.**

**Chapter 7: Miharu the Angry Uchiha. **

I admit, there was a certain degree of excitement in me as my Team shot off into the forest. Kushina was using her Chakra chains to swing from tree to tree like a mix of Doc Oc and Spider-Man, Tom was using his sage mode to attempt to detect seal flags and hostile ninja, whereas I had my Sharingan out and summoned about 40 smaller snakes to do recon throughout the forest. We didn't want any surprises, and I definitely didn't want either of my teammates to get hurt. Unfortunately, we were a bit of a high profile team, for several reasons. First and foremost, we had three heirs to some of the most prestigious clans in Konoha on our team, two of which were functionally the last of their clans in the village. Secondly, I was the apprentice to the Snake Sannin and the next Snake Sage of Konoha. Third, Tom was the next Slug Sage. Lastly, Kushina was both the Kyuubi Jinchuriki and the holder of the Salamander contract, as well as had a rare Uzumaki bloodline trait. So essentially, we'd pretty much scrapped any hopes of maintaining a low profile before we'd even left Konoha. While the wars seemed to have been halted for the moment(hopefully for good), the Hidden Villages would still want to showcase their continued worthiness as a member of the Big Five Villages. That meant the higher profile genin would be disproportionately targeted by the others, in order to one up the others in a controlled and relatively safe-ish environment.

Tom motioned for us to halt a moment, prompting us to all land on the ground. He flicked his eyes around the surrounding woodwork, before he walked over to a tree branch and grabbed one of the flags. Kushina pumped her fist, whereas I kept my wits about me. We may have gotten one flag, but we were by no means near the finish line.

Xxxxx

Meanwhile, across the forest...

"You know we are Jinchuriki, and yet you still approach us?" Han asked incredulously to the odd looking Cloud ninja before him. He was a dark skinned teen with white hair, and sunglasses(despite the fact it was pretty dark in the forest floor), a tattoo on his cheek that looked like bull horns, and carried a variety of swords on his back. His two teammates were another dark skinned teen with spikey white hair and a pale blond dude. Neither of them looked particularly thrilled to be there.

"Ain't no need to act all coy, I'm Killer Bee the Eight tailed Boy!" The teenager from Cloud's words set both Roshi and Han on edge, given he had more tails than both of their beasts, while Kitsuchi figured two Jinchuriki would easily have the advantage.

"Does he always do this?" The Stone ninja asked the other two Cloud ninja incredulously.

"Unfortunately. He originally started doing it to mess with his brother, and he got so caught up in the joke he forgot how to talk normally. That's what he tells the therapist anyway."

"That's weird." Kitsuchi noted without malice.

"Just a smidge."

They would have kept conversing, but Bee began unleashing demonic chakra and began maniacally.

"Listen here, you B tier villains, how dare you ignore me and keep on chillin'!" Bee said manically, before the aura around him coalesced into the shape of a bull, six chakra tails swirling behind him. "Remember this day and all that you see, BECAUSE I'M FUCKING KILLER BEE, EIGHT TAILED JINCHURIKI!" Bee finished with a roar, before launching himself at the two jinchuriki from Hidden Stone, who immediately had to activate their cloaks to keep up.

Meanwhile, Kitsuchi and the two other Cloud ninja, Darui and Shi, decided to work together to find flags while their teammates indulged in a Jinchuriki dick-swinging contest.

The conversation about the food of their homelands was offset by psychotic laughter and explosions in the background.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Back with Team Four...

Tom and Kushina paused mid jump, before they glanced over towards the west, though I wasn't sure why initially, until I saw a blast of demonic chakra shoot into the friggin' sky.

"Okay, so that's a big ol' bowl of nopeflakes." I commented sarcastically, before I changed my trajectory slightly to move in the opposite direction.

"But you two could easily subdue Jinchurikis, though. Especially if they're only genin." Kushina stated blandly, her eye twitching at my actions.

"Listen. Just because I CAN do something, doesn't mean I WANT to. I'm lazy, Kushina, and fighting Jinchuriki is my textbook definition of troublesome."

xxxxxxxxxx

Meanwhile, in a different part of the forest...

Shikaku suddenly sneezed, before he felt like someone finally understood him. Unfortunately, this distracted him mid jump, and he hit his head on a tree branch, causing him to fall unconscious for a moment. This made Choza panic, and shake his teammate frantically.

Inoichi just watched both his teammates with a twitching eye, not sure how to handle them right now.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Again, back with Team 4...

Kushina's eye twitch was pretty noticeable now, and her hair was beginning to rise up behind her.

"Yeah, yeah, Habenero mode. You can punch me later. Right now, we have company." I said, pointing to the irate form of Ameyuri Ringo, the creepy figure of Kushimaru, and the amused looking Kisame Hoshigaki.

"I want payback, you bastard Uchiha! Then I'm going to carve up your chubby redheaded teammate while you watch." Ameyuri said viciously while pointing the Kiba blades at me specifically, though Kisame and Kushimaru just kind of looked at us apologetically.

"Sorry about this. She happens to be a little OCD about revenge." Kisame explained helplessly, before pulling a broadsword off his back.

"Kekekekekekeke" Kushimaru just giggled like a fucking loon while brandishing Nuibari., though Kisame nodded sagely to his teammate.

"True that Kushimaru. You truly are one the wisest of our generation."

Tom and I just stared at them incredulously, not really sure how to deal with how weird these guys were. Kushina, however, was pissed at being called chubby.

"CHUBBY?! DID YOU JUST FUCKING CALL ME CHUBBY?! I WILL FREAKING MURDER YOU, SKANK!" Kushina was now in full Habanero mode, her hair fully risen off the ground and her face completely blank except for her eyes, which promised pain to all who annoyed her.

I stood silently, watching things unfold, blankly locked in eye contact with both Kushimaru and Kisame.

"Stare..."

"Stare..."

"So are we gonna figh-" Kisame began, before I shot a vacuum sphere at him, cutting him off and blasting him away, before I leapt after him.

"MINE!"

Tom just sighed in annoyance, before launching several wood style roots around Kushimaru.

Xxxxxxxxx

With Kushina and Ameyuri...

Kushina stood opposite of the female kunoichi from the Mist, before she reached into her pouch and pulled out a gas mask. She then flipped through hand seals, before slamming her palm into the ground.

"Summoning Jutsu!" One puff of cloud later, and there stood the salamander leader, Dokujin.

"I see I am needed once again, this time by someone other than Hanzo. Interesting." The salamander turned to look at Kushina. "So you wish to end this shinobi, hmm?"

Kushina laughed, but shook her head. "No, I just want to maim her a little."

"Paralysis poison it is then." Dokujin commented with annoyance. He just wanted to poison people for fun, damnit.

Ameyuri channeled the lightning to the Kiba swords, before firing some probe volleys at the girl now riding a salamander.

Her summon easily dodge them, before breathing some paralytic fog towards the volatile girl from Mist. Ringo jumped away, before landing on a nearby tree and began to throw out some hand seals.

"Lightning Style: False Darkness." A giant bolt of electricity launched itself at Kushina once more, who hastily flew through hand seals of her own, before throwing down a tag in front of her, a purple barrier wall rising in front of her to protect her. The jutsu slammed into the wall, before dissipating entirely, leaving the two girls to stare at each other in annoyance. Kushina then leapt off her summon, before they went on the offensive, Kushina unsealing a red katana before clashing swords with Ringo. Both grit their teeth at the other, before they backed away. The traded blows for several minutes, cries of righteous feminine fury echoing through their surroundings. However, Ameyuri forgot about Dokujin in her rush to show up Kushina's Uzumaki style swordsmanship, and was promptly blasted in the back with paralysis poison, causing to lock up, and face plant into the ground.

Kushina pumped her fist in joy, before removing her mask and petting her salamander. "I don't care what anyone says. Salamanders rock."

Dokujin paused a moment, before puffing out his chest, and blew fog into her face, before she also faceplanted. "That's for implying you doubted me."

Let it be known that Salamander summons were very temperamental creatures, which made them a perfect reflection of their summoner.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

With TomCat and Kushimaru...

"Kekekekekekekekeke" Kushimaru continued giggling maniacally, as he was sitting down beside TomCat on a wooden bench Tom had made with his wood style, both content to watch their teammates be idiots and sip on tea they'd brought into the forest.

"I agree, Kushimaru. They ARE complete and utter fools." Both took sips from their respective cups. "Man, that is some strong Oolong tea and this was from one of the islands outside Mist, you said?"

"Kekekeke."

"Huh. I might have to start importing this." Tom mused idly.

More sips, before they resumed watching their friends fight it out. They sighed when they saw both girls get paralyzed by the salamander, before they went over and collected them, dropping them in a stack over to the left, before resuming their impromptu tea time.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

With Kisame and Miharu...

"A sucker punch? Really?" Kisame was annoyed by the Uchiha in front of him. "Still, a wind style user is pretty odd, especially for an Uchiha." He analyzed calmly.

"Huh? Oh, that was just to stake my claim. I wanted to fight you, so I blunted the wind in the jutsu. Now my pesky brother and my feisty teammate won't interfere, now I can enjoy myself."

"Eh? Why would you want to fight me? I'm not even a member of the Seven Swordsman yet." Kisamed asked with a raised eyebrow, unsure of why this guy wanted to fight him.

"Because my water style arsenal is severely lacking." I replied as if commenting about the weather.

Kisame just stared incredulously, before he started laughing.

"You know what? Screw it. I like you. I'll make sure to use plenty then. But first? Your name, Uchiha."

"Miharu. 33rd heir to the Uchiha Clan, Mr. Hoshigaki, future wielder of Samehada."

"Well, if nothing else, you know how to make friends."

I said nothing else, before I began my assault, curious to see how good Kisame was at this point in time. I drew my tanto, before coating it with a somewhat blunted version of the Vacuum Blade. My wind chakra enhanced sword met Kisame's katana with a loud clang, before he grinned. I immediately ducked, a sword slash swiping where my head was moments prior. I whirled around behind the water clone, before running it through with my tanto, making sure to position the blade so it nicked Kisame's right cheek as it dissolved.

"Very dangerous, Mr. Red Eyes. But let's kick it up a notch, shall we, he began flipping through a complex set of seals, before he rammed his fist into the ground, causing water to gush up from underneath us, flooding the clearing. I stood on the surface, calculating his next move. When I saw him run through another long set of seals my eyes widened, as my hands automatically followed his.

"Water Style: Super Shark Bomb Jutsu!" We cried out together, before two large sharks made of water launched towards each other, shattering in the middleground between us and causing water to rain down upon us. I took advantage of the momentary lull to make two shadow clones and darted backwards while my clones rushed Kisame. I landed on a tree, while they distracted him with a combination of Vacuum Wave and Searing Migraine, which prompted Kisame to use a Colliding Water Wall. I then coated my right arm in Black Lightning chakra, before I rushed towards Kisame at high speed.

"Black Lightning Blade!" I yelled, as my right arm pierced through the wall of spinning water. I heard Kisame laugh in surprise, before I watched five water sharks launch at me from the wall. I cursed, before I darted backwards, using my vacuum blade to destroy the water sharks as I did so. Once I slide to a halt, I stopped to analyze Kisame with my Sharingan, who was grinning happily at me.

Kisame was at least Chunin level already, though I got the distinct impression he was still holding back. He was definitely a lot more cunning than he let on, and his ability to counter everything I'd used so far was impressive.

"You're good, Kisame." I complimented him, giving credit was credit was due.

"Back at you, Miharu. Though, I'm a little insulted you're pulling your punches. Your fighting style reeks of missing elements. Meaning you usually use something else in conjunction. My guess? Genjutsu, given those fancy eyes of yours."

"I could say the same to you, my scaley new friend. I was expecting you to collapse the water wall on top of me into a Water Prison Jutsu or a Water Rosary Binding, if you knew sealing arts."

"Nah. Wouldn't have been successful. I could tell you wouldn't fall for it because I can tell you think very similarly to me."

"True enough." I acknowledged, before I glanced towards our respective teammates. Kushina and Ringo were laying opposite of each other paralyzed, while Tom and Kushimaru were sipping tea. I resisted the urge to face palm a bit. "So should we continue? Or no?"

Kisame went into a thinking pose. "Only if you wish. I still have more water jutsu in my bag, though not sure why you'd need a fourth element on top of the three you already have." His comment was both laced with innocence and an accusation.

"Never hurts to learn more jutsu. My master taught me that." I said with a grin, before I shook my head. "Man, if you bother to cultivate that secondary element of yours, you'd be even more of pain to fight."

Kisame's grin only widened. "Noticed that did you? Shame that only the wielder of the Kiba's gets access to higher level Lightning manipulation in our village. Or used to. I only started learning it a week or two ago."

"I admit, I used something similar against my sensei in our genin test. Using it to supplement your water jutsu can be highly effective. Give me ten minutes to catch my breathe, and I'll make a list of some lightning jutsu I know."

"Even that piercing one?" Kisame asked hopefully, before sheathing his sword.

"Sorry, that one is special. Plus, not your style anyway. Your a range type, and you're damn good at it."

"True enough." He replied with a shrug, before he began to walk over to his teammates. He then took a seat beside Kushimaru, who handed him a cup of tea. "Thanks, Chuckles."

I shook my head at the interaction, before I made my way over there as well. I was about to use some healing chakra on Kushina, before I remembered something.

"Kisame." I began, before I looked at him with a serious expression. "Your teacher. Don't listen to his philosophy on comrades. He's a fool trying to turn you into a monster."

Kisame narrowed his eyes a moment, but nodded nonetheless.

"Understood." He replied simply, before he reached over and picked up Ringo, who was still extremely paralyzed. "This was fun, so you better make it to the next round, Miharu. You're a pretty interesting guy."

I waved him off nonchalantly. "Don't worry about it. As for the hothead, the poison will wear off in an hour."

"Got it. Take care." Tom and I watched as they jumped into the tree line and away from us, probably to hole up somewhere until Ringo was at full capacity again.

I glanced at Tom, before I resumed running healing chakra into Kushina's system. She groaned, before she began to sit up.

"Mannnnn. That was not fun." Kushina said with annoyance, before she rolled her shoulders. "Note to self: never take off mask around my summons." She grumbled, glaring at the ground as she kicked some rocks around.

"Don't be harsh on yourself. You did well, Benhime." I stated proudly, offering her a warm smile to try and cheer her up. "You revealed relatively little beyond what she already knew about you, while neutralizing her effectively. You just let your guard down around your new summons, that's all."

She swiped the area under her nose, clearly pleased with the praise. I stopped paying attention to her when she started laughing to herself in a somewhat creepy fashion. Tom, by comparison, looked pretty much the same as he had before our little scuffle. He was still sipping on his cup of tea infuriatingly slow.

"And then there's you, Tom." Upon my addressing him, he flicked his gaze to me, before raising a single eyebrow at my tone. "You quite literally sipped tea with the enemy, brother dearest." I said, pointing an accusatory finger in his direction.

"I don't know what you mean. Kushimaru was a very fine fellow, and certainly a better conversationalist than most Uchiha." Tom replied earnestly, tiling his head to the side as he did so.

"Hn. Wait, shit! I can't believe I just did that!" I refuse to grunt as a primary means of communication, damnit!

Kushina giggled a bit. "See, you really are on your way to being a proud Uchiha. You already have the emotional expressiveness of a sponge."

"Sure, sure. Make fun of the guy who could trap you in unbreakable illusions."

Both stopped laughing immediately.

"Point taken. Now, shall we resume getting flags?" Tom asked, before we took off once more into the treeline, eager to finish this task quickly and efficiently.

Xxxxxxxxxxxx

Somewhere in the Eastern part of the forest...

Mikoto stood shoulder to shoulder with both Minato and Shibi, gritting her teeth as she stared down the 5 teams that had decided to take them out together. They'd been ambushed by the first team, before other's converged on their location as a part of a temporary truce. She flicked her Sharigan eyes over to Minato, who was for some reason still smiling, despite the grim odds. She sighed, but admitted that was part of why she liked him-

Wait. She did not just admit she liked Minato, did she?

'Bad, Mikoto, bad...although perhaps this warrants further exploration afterwards?' Mikoto mused to herself, before she saw Minato step forward. "Minato? What are you doing?"

He gave her a carefree grin, as he pulled out a scroll, which he used to unseal some very odd looking Kunai.

"I've been working on perfecting this cool Jutsu that Sensei showed me. It took me the whole way here, but I managed it. Now, I need you both to throw as many of these kunai as accurately as you can at them, and don't blink. You'll want to see this." He said, before he turned back to face their adversaries.

While both she and Shibi had many questions at his cryptic statement, they complied all the same. She placed three kunai between each of her fingers on both hands, as Minato and Shibi did the same.

"Go!" At Minato's command, they all unleashed the kunai at the 15 other genin, and what Mikoto saw baffled her. She watched as a myriad of yellow flashes happened rapidly before her eyes, until each of their attackers were rendered unconscious on the forest floor, while Minato stood above them, breathing a little heavily.

"Minato?" She was surprised to see him suddenly appear before her in a yellow flash, with a tired grin on his face, before he fell to a knee, prompting Mikoto to catch him.

"Sorry, Miko. I wanted to show you as soon as I mastered it, but I never got a chance to. It's called the Flying Thunder God, and I think it might be one of the most powerful space-time ninjutsu ever made." He looked up into her Sharingan, before he brushed a lock out of her face, before he feel asleep from chakra exhaustion.

Shibi was about to voice concern, before Minato snored rather loudly, signaling he was okay. He shook his head, before he spared her a quick glance. "I will take any flags they may possess, as well as reclaim Minato's special Kunai, while you watch over him. One moment please."

She nodded to her other teammate, before she shifted her position, allowing Minato to rest his head on her lap, his soft snores making her giggle a bit. She allowed herself to run her fingers through his hair, marveling at the softness. She was so caught up in her ministrations that she failed to notice Shibi return from his pilfering.

"I have returned, and I placed my bugs on them, to ensure they remain unconscious until Minato has regained his strength. Truly, he is astounding to manage such a technique at his age." Shibi said from behind her, causing Mikoto to jump slightly, halting her scratching of Minato's head. "As for your actions with Minato's head, I approve of your relationship." Shibi finished, before giving her a giant thumbs up.

She smiled back at her slightly awkward bug using teammate, before she resumed her headpats on their blonde teammate, content to relax for a short while.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

2 hours later, with Team 4...

We'd managed to amass the required number of flags with relative ease. To be honest, they weren't really hidden that well, which lead me to believe the placement was to incite repeated conflicts between the Genin teams in the forest. When I shared this theory with Kushina and Tom, they had varying reactions. Kushina made an 'o' with her mouth whereas Tom merely shrugged, neither one apparently giving much thought to the test's rationale.

That had been about fifteen minutes ago, when we'd gotten our last flag. Now we were making our way towards the safezone at the center of the forest, really just wanting to be back inside where there was air conditioning. After about an 30 minutes of us running at full pace, we landed at the base of the giant wooden tower, which was not too dissimilar to the one in the Forest of Death in Konoha. We were about to knock on the door, when another team landed beside us, causing us to go on our guard.

I subtly made four shadow clones and sent them into the treeline, ready to have them use sensory confusion genjutsu if needed. That was until I realized who had landed next to us.

"Ayy yo what up, Ms. Nine, I cannot believe you are truly so fine." Came the annoying rapping of Killer Bee, who admittedly looked a hell of a lot cooler and suave than me. Darui and Shi landed next to the Eight tailed beast holder, both sighing at his antics.

"Um, who the hell are you?" Kushina's blunt response made me snicker a bit, before I subtly positioned myself between her and Bee, in case they were looking for a fight.

"That, Benihime, is the Eight tailed Jinchuriki Killer Bee, Darui of the Storm Release/Black Lightning, and Shi the Mirage of Cloud." I stated lazily, while pointing to them as I introduced them.

"How do you know our names when we've never met you?" Darui asked curiously, though I saw him inch his hand closer to his sword.

"Trade secret. Don't worry, I don't plan to do anything nefarious. I'm way too lazy for that." I commented dryly, before wrapping an arm around Kushina, causing her to let out a 'meep'. Bee raised an eyebrow behind his shades.

"

"Yo, no lie I came to ask her out, but right now you got me wide mouthed like a trout. I heard Ms. Nine was quite the looker, but if she's with tall, pale and broody then she must be a hook-" Bee suddenly went limp before faceplanting into the ground, prompting me to raise a questioning eyebrow at Shi, who'd held his hand in a ram seal while looking at Bee. He'd apparently just knocked out his teammate with a high level sleep genjutsu.

"He has a tendency to put rhyming first over tact. I saved you the trouble of dealing with an international incident if your redheaded friend decided to beat the snot out of Bee for being idiot." He explained in a slightly embarrassed tone.

Darui decided to chime in as well. "Yeah, Bee is a little dull sometimes. Don't take it personally, miss."

Kushina, for her part, looked like she was torn between wanting to murder Bee, and squeal because of our contact. I tried to remove my arm when I realized what I'd done, but she wrapped those stupid chains around it, keeping it in place. Shit. Tom, on the other hand, had a family of squirrels hanging out on his shoulders, while he grew them an acorn tree. I stopped trying to figure out why he did things like this a lot time ago.

I shook my head, before I replaced myself with one of my hidden clones, which dispelled when it touched Kushina's chakra chains. I then started walking towards the entrance of the tower, ignoring Kushina's indignant cry and Tom speaking Squirrelese. After opening the door, I cast a sideglance back to Team Bee, before calling out.

"Well, uh, it was nice meeting you. Take care."

Darui just gave a lazy wave, reminding me of Kakashi, whereas Shi gave a small, but polite nod. They were apparently waiting for us to get out of sight before they revived Bee. Probably smart, given how volatile Kushina was about insults. I closed the door behind me, before I felt Kushina jump on my back, prompting me to sigh.

"You aren't letting me get away without physical contact, are you?"

"Mou~, why so shy now? You were so bold before, ya know." She said as she rested her head on my shoulder. I sighed again, but didn't try to force her off my back. She'd have just used those damnable chains of hers if I had.

Shaking my head at her antics, Tom and I made our way deeper into the tower, following the winding corridors until we reached the door of a room labeled 'Team 4'. Upon opening it, we saw the bizarre sight of Orochimaru drinking a mojito and wearing a floral shirt and swim trunks.

"Uh, hello sensei. How was the beach?" I asked, though still struggling to process the sight of a man even more pale than I wearing beach wear.

"Ah! I knew my cute little genin would be the first to arrive! And I see Kushina has enacted her grand plan to ensnare you! Equally delightful!" He said with a slight clap of his hands.

"Nuh uh. He put his arm around me all on his own."

"It's true, I saw it, and so did some Kumo ninja. It was so sweet."

I merely pointed my finger at Tom, before he started screaming about crows and ran into a wall. He stopped moving fairly quickly.

"Anyone else want to annoy me?" I asked, pointing my finger at my back, before moving it to my sensei.

"No, I think we've made our point quite efficiently. At any rate, congratulations on passing the first portion of the chunin exams. We will spend the remainder of the week at this tower, before we return to the capitol of the island, where we will spend the next month training for the individual tournament. Get some rest, because I've got some very special things planned for you all. Kukukukuku." I admit, hearing him laugh like that was still pretty creepy. He stood up, before walking towards the exit. "I'm going to go report that you made it to the next round, so make yourselves comfortable. I'll also see about getting us some food, since I'm sure you must be hungry." And with that, he was gone, leaving Kushina and I functionally alone.

I began to sweat slightly, before I turned my head to glance at her, only to feel her plant a kiss on my cheek.

"You didn't have to get jealous, you know. Cloud ninja don't interest me, given they tried to kidnap me." She said with a slight shudder. I frowned a bit, before I twisted my body so that she shifted into a bridal style position in my arms.

"I'm sorry. He's just big and muscley, whereas I'm some awkward guy who beginning to look more and more like our sensei. I know you aren't my girlfriend or anything, but I..." I trailed off, before I sighed again. "I sound like a complete tool." I frowned a bit, frustrated with my actions.

I didn't have long to brood before Kushina started pulled my cheek, trying to stop my frowning.

"Hey now, none of the that. Do I look like someone who's angry?" Her statement gave me pause, before I actually looked at her. Indeed, she looked more amused than mad. "Plus, that meathead was going to call me a hooker. Pass."

"I was very tempted to blast him across the island with wind chakra for that."

"Yeah, well, his teammates said he just doesn't think before speaking sometimes. No harm done, but definitely not the kind of boy I find interesting."

The bait statement was about as subtle as a jackhammer, so I chose not to take it, choosing to instead place her on a futon mattress, before walking away as I heard her nestle herself in blankets.

"Boooooo, Miharu, booooo! That's the part when you're supposed to ask me what kind of boy I'm really interested in." Her tone was fairly teasing, so I debated the pros and cons of using the Flying Thunder God to teleport away. "Hey, you said you wouldn't teleport away anymore!"

I blinked in confusion. "How'd you know I was debating using my space-time ninjutsu?"

"You usually get this annoyed expression like you'd rather be somewhere else, and then you just do it. It'd be cute if you weren't so good at hiding." She commented with humor from her cocoon of warmth.

I groaned a bit, before palming my face. "Why must you be so difficult?"

"Because you like me this way." Came her rather self assured response.

"...Maybe." I replied softly, looking away from her now smug expression.

"So you admit it."

"...Maybe."

"That's useful to know."

"Maybe."

"Are you just saying 'maybe' to avoid further teasing or taking risks?"

"...Maybe."

"Mou~ That's not very brave of you, Miharu. Fortune favors the bold." She replied, before yawning tiredly. Apparently the fights in the forest had taken their toll on her.

"Maybe so, but I still don't know if you actually like me because of me, or it's a result of unintentional manipulation."

"If you were manipulating me, you wouldn't have been honest from the beginning." She stated softly, before she rolled back over to face me. "And even if you did, you went out of your way to save not just me, but many other as well for no other reason than you could."  
"I'm not this hero you seem to think I am." I said a little bitterly, shame at how I'd almost handled this whole situation bubbling up again. "I'm actually pretty selfish."

"Is it so wrong to be a little selfish with the thing you want the most?"

"When it might hurt someone or effect their ability to make their own destiny, yes." I had shut my eyes at this point, wishing I could just end the conversation now. I heard her shuffle out of the blankets, before she walked over to me, placing hands on my head.

"Oh, come on. We both know by now that Minato wouldn't have chosen me in this timeline. For whatever reason, he's interested in Mikoto. That means if you hadn't saved me, either no one would have, or well, Fugaku would have. Neither option is particularly appealing. Sure, you might have been a smidge manipulative in the beginning. But you took many steps to prevent it, and you helped me in so many ways without any expectation of repayment. You took what you knew about the third jinchuriki of the Kyuubi having issues with clones, and made an effort to help me in case I had issues as well. You're a decent guy who just happens to be hilariously bad with people." She said with a bit of humor, before she laid her head against mine.

I hummed in contentment, but didn't say anything.

"I tell you that all time, you idiot. But it takes a cute redhead to say it before it sinks it? How typical." Tom's sarcastic voice made me snort a bit, before I glanced down at him.

"Do you want me to unleash the crows again?" I asked casually, jokingly pointing my finger at him.

"No, no, point taken. I'll just go back to observing this fascinating scene. Don't mind me." He said, before making several gestures to proceed. "Go on. Social Link away!"

I groaned at the Persona reference, but otherwise kept my mouth shut. Kushina giggled a bit at our back and forth, before she pulled away, and returned to her futon.

"Alright, now I'm going to take a nap. Wake me up when the food gets here, or I'll make Kurama chase you."

Tom and I shared an incredulous look, before shaking our heads at our confusing teammate. I leaned back against the wall, content to take a nap after the rollercoaster of a day I'd been through.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

To be continued...

**Another one down. I'm trying to keep my pacing steady, and things reasonable and fun. Either way, thanks for reading another chapter of my fic. **

**For anyone who cares, I will also likely be streaming Death Stranding on tbe night of November 7th when it comes out. Feel free to check that out. My twitch is Knight2518. Be warned I only stream when I'm bored or actually have something interesting to play. **

**At any rate, hope you are all well, and please review constructively, as it helps me improve. **

**Raizen out.**


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